(Of course, if his smile had been just a tad bigger for me than for the others,
I couldnt have waited for the formalities to be over to seek him out in the
crowded ballroom.)
Review Your Repertoire of Smiles
If your job required you to carry a gun, you would, of course, learn all
about the moving parts before firing it. And before taking aim, you would
carefully consider whether it would murder, maim, or merely wound your
target. Since your smile is one of your biggest communications weapons,
learn all about the moving parts and the effect on your target. Set aside five
minutes. Lock your bedroom or bathroom door so your family doesnt think
youve gone off the deep end. Now stand in front of the mirror and flash a
few smiles. Discover the subtle differences in your repertoire.
Just as you would alternate saying Hello, How do you do, and I am
pleased to meet you when being introduced to a group
How to Make Them Feel You Dont Smile at Just Anybody 1 17
of people, vary your smile. Dont use the same on each. Let each of your
smiles reflect the nuances of your sentiment about the recipient.
In Defense of the Quickie
There are times, I discovered, when the quick put-on smile works. For
example, when you want to engineer the acquaintance of someone to whom
you have not had the opportunity to be intrduced. (In the vernacular, thats
pick them up.)
The smiles pickup power was proven for posterity by solemn
researchers at the University of Missouri. They conducted a highly
controlled study titled Giving Men the Come-On: Effect of Eye Contact and
Smiling in a Bar Environment.(I kid you not.) To prove their hypothesis,
female researchers made eye contact with unsuspecting male subjects
enjoying a little libation in a local drinking establishment. Sometimes, the
female researchers folowed their glance with a smile. In other cases, no
smile.
Technique #29
The Exclusive Smile
If you flash everybody the same smile, like a Confeerate dollar, it loses
value. When meeting groups of people, grace each with a distinct smile. Let
your smiles grow out of the beauty big players find in each new face.
If one person in a group is more important to you than the others,
reserve an especially big, flooding smile just for him or her.
ooja
(Ooja)
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