True LIFEMay 2019 • happiful • 49Pete’s journey shows that being strong is not about bottling
things up and holding them in, it’s about having the courage
to let yourself experience what is inside you. Social norms
are changing, and it’s good that we are encouraged to
speak more openly about our problems. It’s
great to hear how well supported Pete has been;
I wonder what support readers might access if
they let the people around them in.Our Expert Says
Fe Robinson | MUKCP (reg)
Psychotherapist and couples counsellorpeople to help you through,
is stunning. My journey
was minuscule compared to
others, but just being there
was a privilege.
Since the marathon, there
have been good times and
bad times. I’ve had a variety
of medication – literally
from A to Z, amitriptyline to
zopiclone, with many others
in between. I’ve put on a lot of
weight as a side-effect, but I’d
rather wear out clothes than
my family.
It’s strange to say, but I think
that depression has improved
me. I value every day I have
with my family; we have more
time together now, and it’s
precious.
I’ve seen a psychotherapist,
gained new understanding,
and have been able to face
some of my demons. Talking
made an incredible difference.
It’s like a release valve. I was
open about my struggles to
my male friends. I wish I had
talked many years earlier.
More people than I could have
imagined have been open
about their frailties – but only
after I opened up.
We need to openly discuss
mental health. As a man,
I was always told not to- and suffered as a result.
It shouldn’t be that way.
There’s no shame, and that’s
why I wanted to be open
about my issues. I shared
my story on Facebook and
Instagram recently, and was
overwhelmed by the positive
response. It was wonderful to
get nice messages and support
from friends. I found it was
much better to open up than
to man up.
My illness used to make
me feel like a bad Daft Punk
song: ‘Older, Greyer, Fatter,
Weaker’. It made me doubt
everything, and destroyed my
life. I’ve used alcohol, drugs,
caffeine and promiscuity to
try to block it out. I should
have opened up. Those dark
bubbles that you bottle upThe dark
bubbles you
bottle up
inside will
go flat if
you just let
them out
For Pete, talking about his problems
has been like opening a release valveinside will just go flat if you
let them out.
There are ups and downs,
but now I don’t have to
hide. The dark moments are
surrounded by lots of light.
I’ve been so lucky to have
incredible support at home
and at work, people who have
guided me through and make
me glad to be who I am.
My illness doesn’t define me,
or own me. Being open has
helped me to understand the
illness and myself. Opening
up wasn’t easy, but it’s the best
thing I did.Pete ran the London Marathon to give
back to the charity that helped him