Jean is not alone in noting that artist’s dates sweeten her moods. For many
students artist’s dates bring a heightened sense of well-being. It is as if the act
of self-nurturance that artist’s dates require brings to us a new sense that the
universe itself is a nurturing place. It is as if we commit to our care only to
find that the world co-commits.
“I decided to take my first dance class in twenty years,” Janet, a nurse,
reveals, “but I was afraid. I went to breakfast at my normal diner and was
seated at the counter next to a woman who taught beginner’s dance. She was
very nice, and when I told her that I was coming back she suggested I start
with her. She even offered me my first class for free.”
It isn’t unusual for the universe to support our desires with some helpful
synchronicity. Mark had a lively interest in Africa, which he decided to
explore in his artist’s dates. He began with a meal at an Ethiopian restaurant.
On the bulletin board at the restaurant, he noticed a sign advertising African
dance. “Why not?” he told himself, and took down the number. “Although I
think I am a klutz, I actually loved the class,” he recalls. “But what I really
loved was the drumming. I struck up a conversation with the drummer, who
said he offered private lessons. I am now in week six of drum lessons and I
am loving it.” As a teenager, Mark had fooled around with a drum kit.
Drumming again, he felt like a teenager, young and full of vigor.
Artist’s dates often lead us to make peace with our past. Gabriella, a
caterer, had ridden hunter jumpers as a young girl. Now in her early forties,
she hadn’t ridden in more than twenty years. “I thought I would just ride
once,” she tells me. “But I rode once and it was so wonderful that I realized I
wanted to ride always. I started taking weekly lessons, then I leased a
wonderful horse. I am sorry for all the missed years, but when I am riding, I
forget about those years. All that exists is me and the horse. I feel like I am
turning back into the girl I once was.”
A renewed sense of youthful exuberance is a frequent fruit of artist’s dates.
In seeking what it is we would like to do, we often consult a youthful part of
our self, something that might be called our “inner explorer.” This part of our
self is an optimist and an amateur in the best sense of the word.