92 CultureShock! Egypt
Unexpected Engagement
In her excitement for learning about everything Egyptian, one of my
students pursued a conversation with a shopkeeper, asking ‘all about
Egyptian life’. Big mistake! To her surprise and embarrassment, she
found herself accidentally ‘engaged’ within about one hour of arriving
in Cairo and spent the next three weeks trying to avoid her would-be
suitor who was extremely persistent.So what do you do if you really want an Egyptian husband?
Well, first, find other foreign women (American, European,
Asian, etc) who are married to an Egyptian and ask them
what everyday life is like. If you still think this is what you
want, the next thing is to meet men through an appropriate
introduction, for example through business, at social clubs,
at university or through friends. Third, understand the nature
of courtship, the marriage contract and how it is arranged
in Egypt. Finally, have someone act as your intermediary,
preferably a male relative or minimally an Egyptian friend
who can act as your ‘brother’, to arrange the contract.Dating and Marriage
Courtship rituals in Egypt differ significantly from those in
the West. Young men and women do not have the range
of opportunities to get to know one another as they do, for
example, in the United States or Great Britain. As a rule, only
a small portion of the upper-class population undertakes
anything that roughly corresponds to what is termed dating
in the West. Even so, these relationships tend to be associated
with public activities. Rarely would couples spend time alone.
Unmarried couples simply do not live with one another
in Egypt.
Some young people do attend discotheques, movies,
restaurants, social clubs and sporting events as couples.
Access tends to be limited by both wealth and social
acceptance. People who socialise at these places generally
tend to be more educated, wealthier and wear Western-
style clothing. Still, only an extremely small percentage of
Egyptians consider it proper for young men and women to
be out socially on a one-to-one basis. Western-style dating