TH E H I G H PR I E ST O F BA N G E R N O M I CS
James Ruppert
don’t h av e t o t e l l y ou t h at
we live in very uncertain
times. Traditionally the
car market, both new
and used, doesn’t respond well to any
sort of crisis. Certainly the new car
m a rk e t i s f a r mor e v ol at i le w he n it
comes to world events. The used car
m a rk e t i s r at he r mor e r e a c t i v e , a nd
t he p e ople de a l i n g i n it h av e t o b e
responsive indeed to changes or
t he y w i l l go out of bu si ne s s.
What’s going on right now, then?
Well, at least one dealer I know
sent me a text the other day with the
revelation that he’s added 43 ‘cheap’
c a r s t o h i s s t o c k. He h a sn’t e x a c t l y got
a pound, just quite a big garden. This
dealer is betting on people needing
emergency cars that work. Substitutes
for the inevitable and undesirable
public transport shortfalls.
All this begs the question of just
w h at shou ld b e i n s t o c k at t i me s l i k e
these. These cars won’t always bepretty, interesting or clever; this is
Bangernomics at its most visceral.
There are still loads of old Toyota
C or ol l a s i n c i r c u l at ion , a nd it ’s e a s y
to see why. There are even bug-eyed
ones from the 1990s for peanuts that
will run all day long. If you don’t want
t o go ba c k mor e t h a n 2 0 y e a r s , how
about 18 years? About £400 will get
you a 2002 1.6 VVT-i but perhaps
w it h 1 5 0k m i le s , w h ic h i s f a i rl y
academic. There may be rusty wheel
arches and an interior that has seen
better days, but never mind, because
it will start first time every time.
T he Vol k s w a ge n G ol f i s a nabsolute constant. I was surprised
t o c ome a c r o s s a 2 0 0 4 1. 4 F SI
model at just £900. Some might see
the 140,000 miles as off-putting,
but this did at least have a dealer
warranty for reassurance. It looks
surprisingly modern and I have
f i r s t-h a nd e x p e r ie nc e of t he e n g i ne ,
which is tough and will deliver a
comfy 40mpg, if not a bit more. When
times get better, it ought to be very
r e s e l l a ble on t he ba si s t h at it i s a G ol f.Ford Mondeos have been fantastic
since day one. There are sensational
ones about and I came across a victim
of London’s Ultra Low Emission
Zone that was being sold at £275.
A 2003 1.8 manual with 130,000
miles, it had a set of new tyres and 12
months’ MOT, which one hopes has
no significant advisories. Apparently
a f u l l h i s t or y, t o o. T h i s i s a f a m i l y c a r
for nothing that’s roomy, practical
and fixable if the worst happens.
Just three examples there for the
forecourt of doom. A dealer will make
money, a private seller will unload
something they no longer need and
a motorist becomes or stays mobile,
hopefully with cash to spare for fuel.
In times like these, you need a banger that won’t let you down
CARS BUILT FOR A CRISIS
Corollas from the
1990s aren’t past
their shelf life yet
A Golf is a sensible
car to buy and an
easy one to sell
`
Dealers have to
respond to change or
go out of business
a
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JAGUAR S-TYPE
Purring around the seamier
parts of London in an old Jag
sounds like fun, but if you can’t
stretch to a Mk2, how about this
X-reg S-Type? It’s a 3.0 V6 that’s
done 93,000 miles and has an
MOT until October. It has a few
choice dents (perhaps acquired
during a bungled getaway), but
what do you expect for £500?
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