http://www.writers-online.co.uk APRIL 2020^67If you
have a question
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consider, email jane@
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comNew author Gillian Harvey can’t believe her luck...
now that she’s got Book Two Blues to contend withUnder the covers
Did I mention that I have signed up for a two-book deal? Lucky me, right?
The only problem is that now I’m tasked with delivering the next novel
in two months’ time. No problem for a seasoned (jaded) writer like myself,
surely? After all, I’ve churned out seven unsuccessful chunks of literature
previously – what’s so different now?
The problem is – and don’t laugh – writing when you absolutely know
someone important is going to read it is mind-blowing.
Yes, I know. Poor me and my too-tight diamond shoes. I know I’d have
killed for this opportunity a year ago – and I’m still ridiculously grateful
that I’ve got this far. But it’s hard to write something authentic with the
spectre of your publisher looming over you.
Will she like it? Was my other novel a one-hit wonder? Will she
understand what I mean by that joke, that metaphor? Am I writing with
her in mind, rather than thinking about a wider audience?
Of course before, when I was writing with hope rather than as part
of an actual deal, it wasn’t much fun at times either. Not least because
I had to ride constant waves of self-doubt. I’d sometimes abandon a
manuscript for months, and spent much of my time worried about
whether there was any point.
But bearing in mind I was writing for an audience of three – or possibly
four – friends and family members, at least I knew that when finally
finished my manuscript it would be well received. I was unselfconscious,
and this meant that when I managed to motivate myself to write, my
words flowed freely.
Another difficulty I’ve encountered this time is the fact that after several
edits I remember my previous novel in intimate detail. Before, once I’d
started something new, I could forget about what I’d written in the past.
This time, when editing No 2, I found a few recurring themes and jokes
I’d been unaware of when writing. The most disturbing repeat so far? Both
novels featured a man wearing a skin-tight onesie. Who knew that was
lurking in my subconscious?
Of course there are many, many plus points to my situation. Not least
that I actually sit down each day and write, no matter what. My previous
method of writing in fits and starts meant my manuscripts often had
cavernous plot holes – and minor characters would change their names,
hair colour or job halfway through the text. This time when I edit, there
will be far less to do; the plots and subplots should
hopefully tie up nicely.
See? It’s great. I love my diamond shoes, and for the
most part they only chafe a little at times.
But I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that- even with a book deal – a writer’s life is riddled
with angst. - Everything is Fine by Gillian Harvey is due for
publication by Orion Fiction on 28 May.
important part of the creative process – I could faff for Britain
- and that if you don’t go out and see a bit of life, you’ll have
nothing to write about when you do want to. Which could be
another aspect to this.
What might be really helpful on all levels, is to start a
diary. Buy a nice journal and make a pact with yourself to
write something in it every day. Even if it’s only ‘Got up, ate
cornflakes, didn’t feel like writing...’
I would wager that you will soon find the one sentence
becomes a paragraph that turns into a small essay. Write about
who you see, what you do, whether you liked the film you
watched, how you feel...
You may discover you are missing your sense of purpose, or
the banter with your work colleagues, and that is leading to
your negative view of the writing you once loved.
For if you think about it logically, the short story market
has not shrunk any more dramatically in the last few weeks,
than it had in the last couple of years. It is your feelings that
have changed.
It is true that some short-story slots have gone – from the
women’s magazines, for example – but there are still plenty
of opportunities out there. If you do like submitting stories
to magazines, take a look at Patsy Collins’ excellent womag
writing blog https://womagwriter.blogspot.com/ for the latest
news on who’s taking what. Or enter some competitions. Look
at the competition supplement with this very issue, or Writers'
News in other months– you will find writing contests galore.
In the meantime, perhaps you could try something different
to kick-start the imagination – poetry or flash fiction maybe?
Again, look on the web for outlets.
And is there a local writing group you could join? Hearing
others talk about their own work may well rekindle your
enthusiasm. If you have writing mates, get them round for
lunch or coffee. Or catch up on your email correspondence
with like-minded pals. Anything that will get you back in the
groove, as it were.
What can work well is to re-visit your past work. Dig
out the very first story you ever wrote. What would you do
differently now? Are you still proud of it or are you thinking
of all the ways in which it could be improved? You may even
feel moved to write another draft. Study published writers
too. Get a book of short stories by successful authors and just
enjoy the form all over again, reminding yourself what you
admire about it. Read some great novels. Daunting can be
invigorating. Never say never.
The very fact that you are thinking about writing
demonstrates that it is still an important part of you. Allow
yourself these weeks off and when the time is right, you will
not be able to resist picking up that pen. I think you will be
writing again quite soon.
Good luck.
Diamond shoes