introduction
Despite the many difficulties they face, Afghan women are far from
the weak, powerless victims portrayed in some Western polemics, while
historians tend to forget when discussing rulers, male Islamic scholars
and pirs that they all had wives. Women have always exercised consid-
erable influence in the Muslim world, both in private and public. In
ninth -century Balkh two of the wives of Ahmad b. Khizrawayh became
renowned exponents of Islamic law,10 and the Iraqi-born celibate mystic
Rabi‘a al-‘Adawiyya is celebrated in Farid al-Attar’s famous biographies
of early Sufis.11 The Timurid queen Gauhar Shad broke with convention
by founding many major Islamic institutions in Herat, while under the
Durrani monarchy senior females in the royal zanana influenced national
policy and determined the succession to the throne.
For nearly a century a number of educated Afghan women have
committed themselves to the struggle for women’s rights and have been
very vocal, though usually out of the public eye. In Herat there are several
well-known female musicians and ensembles, while some women even
live as boys.12 A few Afghan women have also fought in battle alongside
their husbands, while a defeated ruler would often send his senior wife,
bareheaded, to the victor to plead for mercy. A high-ranking woman who
has been sexually violated may well send her veil or bloodstained clothing
to a close male relative and demand he avenge the family honour. In less
exalted circles, a family unable to gain the ear of a senior official will send
their womenfolk to plead on their behalf or even to pour scorn on him
publicly. Usually the official is so shamed by having to address women in
public that he will act, if only to get rid of the nuisance. It has always been
a tradition in Afghan society that punishment is only meted out to the
male members of a defeated foe, and until recently women were rarely
imprisoned and never executed.
Within the family, senior women gain status, power and influence by
bearing children, particularly male offspring. They manage the house-
hold affairs, hold the keys of the food store, control budgets, supervise
servants and organize food for family and guests. The women nurture the
children and are often the ones to initiate discussion about marriage alli-
ances for their sons and daughters. For this reason, Afghan men are often
far more attached emotionally to their mothers than to their fathers. It is
not unknown for an Afghan woman to deny her husband sexual relations
in order to show her displeasure or to make him change his mind. There
are also informal checks and balances in what still is a male-dominated
world. A man who divorces his wife or beats her badly risks the wrath
of his in-laws, who will have no compunction about paying the family a
nandana
(Nandana)
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