21 March 2020 | New Scientist | 53The back pages Feedback
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[email protected]D-I-WHY Twisteddoodles for New Scientist
It’s heartening to see so many
calm responses to the coronavirus
outbreak. For example, ever-
resourceful citizens of the US
have been making their own hand
sanitiser from budget spirits. After
numerous customers tweeted about
this bright idea, vodka brand Tito’s
patiently responded to each of
them, advising that hand sanitiser
should contain at least 60 per cent
alcohol, so its 40 per cent proof
product doesn’t meet the standard.
In Australia, people have been
calmly preparing for the absolute
worst-case scenario: finding
themselves out of toilet paper.
Most of the country’s supplies
are made locally, but a rumour
of decreased production in China
seemed to send panic through
some communities, resulting in
shops with empty shelves.
Rolls were reportedly being
sold for hundreds of dollars online.
Luckily, the Australian press can be
relied on to help in a crisis. The NT
News came to the rescue by printing
an eight-page pull-out “complete
with handy cut lines, for you to use
in an emergency”. Eager to match
this example, Feedback willingly
proffered itself for this purpose,
but sadly our editor insisted that
we should still print some words
on the page, even if it is to be used
for personal hygiene. Please don’t
hesitate to tear out this page if you
find yourself in need.
Take a bow
In the UK, of great concern to
the public is how to make formal
greetings once shaking hands has
been deemed too dangerous. The
England cricket team has opted for
fist bumps, but as this still involves
hand-to-hand contact, it doesn’t
seem like a vast improvement.
Elbow bumps are another
popular option, but one whose
wisdom seems questionable
when you remember that we are
also being advised to cough and
sneeze into a bent elbow. Some are
tapping feet, but having tried this
out, we are slightly concerned that
this could lead to a risk of losing
one’s balance and falling over.
You don’t need to look far back
in history to find some truly non-
contact modes of formal greeting,
such as the bow or curtsey, which
might be more sensible.
Feedback recommends the
“ner-ner” handshake, popular
in school playgrounds, in which
you extend an arm as if offering
a handshake, but withdraw it at
the last minute and wiggle your
fingers in front of your face.
Traditionally this is done with
the thumb touching the nose,
but touching one’s nose is now a
complete no-no, so a 2 centimetre
gap is advisable.Sum tweet
If we had a penny for every time a
media pundit showed a shockingly
poor grasp of numeracy, Feedback
would have enough money to
launch an expensive but highly
ineffective run for president.
Well, maybe not if you did the
actual maths, but why let that
stand in the way of a good point?
The latest example appeared in
a segment on news channel MSNBC
that drew attention to a tweet
decrying the $500 million spent
by Michael Bloomberg on his
short-lived election campaign.
“The US population is 327 million.
He could have given each American
$1 million and still have money
left over,” journalist Mekita Rivas
tweeted. “It’s an incredible way of
putting it,” said presenter Brian
Williams, and on this point we
agree wholeheartedly.Mixed up advice
Thankfully, the media are being
careful to get their facts straight
on coronavirus advice. Having
initially made an error in an article
titled “Coronavirus: Nine reasons
to be reassured”, The Guardian
quickly made a correction. “An
earlier version wrongly stated
that ‘a solution of ethanol,
hydrogen peroxide and bleach
will disinfect surfaces’,” it said.
“It is dangerous to combine suchsubstances. It now states correctly
that ‘a solution of ethanol, a
solution of hydrogen peroxide *or*
a solution of bleach’ will disinfect
surfaces.” (Emphasis added.)
Chemistry lessons might also
be required at the BBC, which
stated that the E10 fuel being
considered to help the UK reduce
CO 2 emissions “contains less
carbon and more ethanol than
fuels currently on sale”. It might
be more eco-friendly still if boffins
could work out a way to produce
carbon-free ethanol. Thanks to
James Olver for bringing this to
our attention.Sty phone
Surreal news from North Yorkshire,
UK, where a fire broke out on a farm
after a pig swallowed a pedometer
that was being worn by another pig.
“After nature had taken its course,it’s believed that the copper from
the batteries reacted with the
pigpens contents and in conjunction
with dry bedding, ignited burning
approx. 75sqm of hay,” the North
Yorkshire Fire and Rescue Service
posted on Twitter.
We thought New Scientist was
on top of the trend for wearable
electronics, but this fad is more
pervasive than we realised if even
livestock are keeping track of their
step count.
According to the fire service,
the pedometer was being worn to
prove that the pigs were free range.
Feedback is a firm believer in
animal welfare, but we are unsure
whether instilling them with our
exercise-tracking obsession is
entirely helpful in this regard. We
shouldn’t scoff though – pigs have
long been associated with apple
products, and perhaps this
individual is a twirly adopter. ❚