PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPSchildren so that they form amiable, supportive bonds. For instance, is
it better to space children out over time or have them as close in age
as possible? And do same-sex siblings get on better than siblings of
the opposite sex? Despite the fact that the vast majority of people have
siblings, there was little research on the psychology of sibling relation-
ships before the 1990s. Today, however, psychology does have some
preliminary answers.
We know, for example, that siblings can have a negative effect on each
other. Children and adolescents who have a sibling who was hostile
towards them in early childhood are more likely to suffer from anxiety,
while teenagers who have one close in age who drinks too much alcohol
are at increased risk from doing the same. Those whose parents argue
are also more likely to experience friction between each other, although
it’s possible the causal effects here run in both directions (having chil-
dren who don’t get on may well lead to strife between parents). On a
more positive note, there’s evidence that having a sibling can lead to
precocity when it comes to the ability to empathize and see another
person’s point of view. Research by Judy Dunn, now at the Institute of
Psychiatry in London, showed that children who indulge in plenty of
pretend play with a brother or sister, and who spend time talking about
mental states with them, are likely to excel when tested on their under-
standing of emotions.
And then there are those pressing questions about gender differ-
ences and age gaps between brothers and sisters. According to a major
ongoing study by Judy Dunn and her collaborators over the last ten years,
these factors matter far less than parents think. Earlier sibling research
had mostly relied on asking parents about the relations between their
children. Dunn’s team adopted the novel approach of using puppets
to directly ask four- to eight-year-olds about their sibling relations. For
example, one puppet called Iggy would say “My brother and I argue”,
then a second puppet, Ziggy, would respond “My brother and I don’t
argue. How about you and your brother?” The results showed that the
warmest relationships were described by girls with a younger sister and
the least warm by boys with a younger sister. A smaller age-gap between
siblings was also associated with better relations, but these effects of
gender and age were extremely modest. The household environment and
the quality of the relationship between parents were more significant
factors. Specifically, sibling relations were better when the household
was more organized, with regular routines and little background noise,
and when parents were happily married.