224 Friendship and Conflict
control, and ensembled individualism, where the self- other boundary is more fluid.
In self- contained individualism, the self is viewed as exclusionary, such that “if one
were to draw a circle marking off the region of self from the region of nonself, the
circle would be drawn as to exclude others from the region defined as belonging to
the self ” (Sampson, 1988, p. 16), whereas in ensembled individualism, the view of
self is more inclusive, such that “the circle would include others within the region
defined as self ” (Sampson, 1988, p. 16). Unfortunately, cross- cultural research
addressing the transmission of these conceptually different types of individualism is
scarce, but it is possible that, depending on the prevalent values regarding individu-
alism encouraged in a particular culture, friends may approach competition with
distinctly different motivations. If the motivation is “winner take all” (as is likely in
cultures encouraging self- contained individualism), the friendship may suffer, but
if the motivation is “we’re competing but we’re ultimately in this together” (ensem-
bled individualism), the friendship likely stays intact. Perhaps in close, high- quality
friendships, the competitive “circle” includes both self and friend, whereas in poor
quality friendships or competition with strangers, the circles are separate. Not sur-
prisingly, these two motivations seem to align with— and possibly work in conjunc-
tion with— the concept of competing to win versus competing to excel.
Summary
Clearly, this integrative model of the role of competition in friendship is specula-
tive and needs further empirical examination. Without rigorous longitudinal, cross-
cultural research, it is impossible to specify the direction of influence between the
overlapping elements of the model outlined here. However, as we begin to under-
stand the precise connections between gender socialization, the motives underly-
ing competitiveness, and how individualistic and collectivist values are socialized
and transmitted through cultural institutions, we will better understand the pro-
cesses that make competition either a boon to friendship or the path to friendship
dissolution.
Future Directions
The future study of competition in friendship holds much promise, but researchers
should consider several issues as they expand on previous work in this area. First, it
is not completely clear whether a competitive situation has exactly the same impact
on friendship as competitiveness as an enduring personality trait. Although there are
threads of consistency in the past findings, future research should attempt to tease
apart these influences both conceptually and methodologically. For example, it may
be that some friends can “turn on” the competitive drive when in a competitive situ-
ation and turn it off (or “cool off ”) when the contest is over, whereas other friends