Chapter 5 Communication and Culture 145Accommodate Appropriately
Another way to improve intercultural communication is to adapt your language
and nonverbal behaviors. Recall from Chapter 3 that adjusting your language
and style of speaking toward the people with whom you are communicating
is a process called accommodation. On a simple level, you do this when you
talk to a child, squatting down to get eye contact and using a basic vocabulary;
police officers also do this when they adopt the street slang or foreign phrases
commonly used in the neighborhoods they patrol. When speakers shift their
language or nonverbal behaviors toward each other’s way of communicating,
they are engaging in convergence. We typically converge to gain approval from
THINK
ABOUT
THIS❶ Would this situation be
different if it took place in
a freshman dorm and Greg
was a randomly selected
roommate? Would it be
ethical for Greg to ask you
to follow the same restric-
tions—and would it be un-
ethical for you to refuse?
❷ What if Greg’s reasons
for having food restrictions
encompassed additional
co-cultural factors, such
as religion? Would this be
a more, less, or equally
pressing reason for you
to accommodate food
restrictions in your home?
Why or why not?
❸ How might you struc-
ture an ethical response
to Amanda or an ethical
conversation with Greg
based on the suggestions
for improving intercultural
communication provided
in this chapter? How might
you be mindful, be em-
pathic, or desire to learn?That’s Not a Soy Substitute
You and your friend Greg signed a lease for an off-campus apartment—you
both wanted the opportunity to cook for yourselves rather than eat in the din-
ing hall every night. In fact, food is actually one of the main reasons that Greg
brought up the idea of moving off campus in the first place.
Greg is a strict vegan and does not consume animal products, including
meat, dairy, and even honey. You are not a vegan—in fact you’re not even a
vegetarian—but you’ve always admired and respected Greg’s passion for
animal rights, his affiliation with the American Society for the Prevention of
Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA), and his hard work to become a veterinarian.
Before you and Greg decided to move in together, you had a frank con-
versation during which he told you that he would be uncomfortable having
animal products in the apartment and wondered if you would be willing to
eat a vegan diet in your shared space. You thought Greg would make a great
roommate and you wanted the situation to work out, so you agreed. Besides,
you figured you could always grab a cheeseburger on campus.
The arrangement worked out rather well and you barely think about the
food restrictions, except for when Greg’s girlfriend Amanda visits. Amanda is
well aware of Greg’s desires and views but you suspect that she finds them
to be ridiculous and insulting. Sometimes you even feel that she’s trying to
bait you into complaining about Greg’s veganism so that the two of you can
“gang up” on him in an effort to enact a change of behavior. You tried to stay
out of it, but one evening you arrived home to find Amanda alone in your liv-
ing room, eating a container of pork fried rice—and we’re not talking about
some sort of soy pork substitute. “Please don’t tell Greg,” she pleaded. “I
told him I’d hang out here until he’s done with class tonight and I got hungry.
I cannot eat any of that tofu and wheat gluten stuff in your refrigerator so I
ordered takeout. Besides, you must think that his restrictions on what we eat
here are crazy... don’t you?”
You feel annoyed by this conversation and want to mention it to Greg,
but you also feel that Greg and Amanda’s communication and discussions
about personal practices and group affiliations are their business. What
should you do?EVALUATINGCOMMUNICATIONETHICS