Chapter 7 Developing and Maintaining Relationships 195Sherlock Holmes television adaptations or the original nineteenth-century novels
by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle). But the benefits of the relationship (including
intrigue, intellectual stimulation, and a desire to “fix” or help a deeply troubled
individual) might just outweigh the costs (such as personal safety, frequent
insults, and lack of emotional connection or support).
Reducing Uncertainty
Although we weigh the costs and rewards in all stages of a relationship, at the
very beginning we do not have much information to consider. We may have
excitement at the prospect of a new friendship to enjoy or romance to explore,
but the uncertainty about the other person is also uncomfortable. That’s why we
need to use a variety of techniques to get to know one another.
According to uncertainty reduction theory, when two people meet, their
main focus is on decreasing the uncertainty about each other (Berger & Bradac,
1982). The less sure you are of the person’s qualities, the way the person will
behave, or what will happen, the higher the degree of uncertainty. Thus, reduc-
ing uncertainty increases your ability to predict that person’s behavior. As two
people—college roommates, coworkers, romantic partners—reduce the uncer-
tainty between them, they uncover similarities, become better at predicting what
the other will do or say, and thus develop more comfort.
In order to reduce uncertainty and increase the likelihood of a closer rela-
tionship, you must obtain information about your new relational partner. If
you’re a fan of the Twilight series, you know that upon first noticing each other at
school, Edward and Bella each used several strategies to find out more informa-
tion about the other. Bella asked her classmates about Edward; she watched how
he behaved and made observations about how he presented himself. Eventually,
she questioned him directly. Edward, finding his ability to read minds useless on
Bella, was forced to employ similar strategies. Unless you too can read minds,
you’ve likely employed those same strategies yourself. Depending on the situa-
tion, three types of strategies may work well: passive strategies, active strategies,
and interactive strategies.
Passive Strategies
Most college students who live on campus are faced with the prospect of shar-
ing a small space with a complete stranger. When Shawna heard about her new
roommate, Ramona, she entered her name and hometown into Google. She
quickly found Ramona on Facebook and learned that she is a concert pianist and
an avid knitter who sometimes sells her creations through Etsy.com (see Antheu-
nis, Valkenburg, & Peter, 2010).
Shawna engaged in a passive uncertainty reduction strategy. Passive strategies
involve observing others in communication situations without actually interact-
ing with them. You may also analyze their interactions with others when you
believe they are not under a lot of pressure to conform to social roles. Without
Ramona knowing it, Shawna had already found out quite a bit about her. Social
networking allows us to monitor others with relative ease, but we also use passive
strategies whenever we observe others going about their day-to-day business.
CONNECT
It’s important to reduce
uncertainty in all com-
munication contexts. For
example, in Chapter 12 we
discuss audience analysis,
which allows you to learn
about the people who will
listen to your speech.
By understanding your
audience’s expectations,
learning about their
opinions of your topic, and
carefully considering their
demographics, you can
reduce uncertainty and
determine the most
effective way to reach
them.