Real Communication An Introduction

58 Part 1  Basic Communication Processes

and receptive to information about their abilities, knowledge, and talents.

Low-sensitive people would be less responsive to such information. For exam-

ple, when Olympic short track skater Apolo Ohno bombed at the Olympic

trials in 1998, he wasn’t interested in hearing that his efforts weren’t suffi-

cient. He was demonstrating a low sensitivity level to the advice and feedback

from his coach, friends, and family. Ohno’s father sent him to a secluded

cabin for eight days to contemplate his career. After that, Ohno decided that

he was ready to receive the feedback that he needed to improve his game. He

developed a higher sensitivity to feedback, went on to win eight Olympic

medals (Bishop, 2010), and finished the World Championships in the gold,

silver, or bronze medal position eighteen times. Figure 2.6 illustrates how

self-presentation and self-disclosure constitute the behavior segment of “The

Self,” seen in Figure 2.5.

Technology: Managing the Self and Perceptions

If you’re wondering how your friend Ned is doing, all you need to do is check

out his Facebook profile—right? There you see photographs of his recent visit

with his longtime girlfriend’s family in Texas. You read funny status updates

about his apartment hunt. And you see that others wrote on his wall to con-

gratulate him on his recent promotion. Life is going well for Ned, so you

send him a private message to let him know that you’re glad for him. Would

you be surprised if Ned responded to share that he is considering a breakup

with his girlfriend, that he hates his job, and that he can’t afford a decent

apartment because his student loans are crushing him? How is this possible

(you wonder) when Ned’s profile seems to indicate that his life is fulfilling

and happy?

This is possible because blogs, tweets, chat rooms, and dating and social net-

working sites allow you to control the presentation of self far more carefully than

in face-to-face encounters. When you manage the self online, you can much

more easily choose what to reveal and what to conceal. You can decide whether

you will reveal your gender, ethnicity, and race, as well as your religious or politi-

cal preferences. What’s more, you can edit, revise, and organize the information

you disclose before the message goes out. In this way, you can present an image

that is smart, charming, and eloquent, even if you tend to be nervous or timid

in face-to-face communication. You are ultimately the one who controls this

Intentional communication

to show elements of the

self for strategic purposes

Revealing the self

by sharing information

about the self

BEHAVIOR =+SELF-PRESENTATION SELF-DISCLOSURE

(verbal and nonverbal)

FIGURE 2.6
UNDERSTANDING
BEHAVIOR