There are people who try to live this way. They take vows of
chastity or solitude, or, conversely, try to reduce relationships to
their most transactional or minimal form. Or because they have been
hurt before, they put up walls. Or because they are so talented, they
dedicate themselves exclusively to their work. It is necessary, they
say, for they have a higher calling. The Buddha, for instance, walked
out on his wife and young son without even saying goodbye, because
enlightenment was more important.
Yes, every individual should make the life choices that are right
for them. Still, there is something deeply misguided—and terribly
sad—about a solitary existence.
It is true that relationships take time. They also expose and
distract us, cause pain, and cost money.
We are also nothing without them.
Bad relationships are common, and good relationships are hard.
Should that surprise us? Being close to and connecting with other
people challenges every facet of our soul.
Especially when our inner child is there, acting out. Or we are
pulled away by lust and desire. Or our selfishness makes little room
for another person.
The temptations of the world lead us astray, and our tempers hurt
the ones we love.
A good relationship requires us to be virtuous, faithful, present,
empathetic, generous, open, and willing to be a part of a larger
whole. It requires, in order to create growth, real surrender.
No one would say that’s easy.
But rising to this challenge—even attempting to rise to it—
transforms us... if we let it.
Anyone can be rich or famous. Only you can be Dad or Mom or
Daughter or Son or Soul Mate to the people in your life.
Relationships come in many forms. Mentor. Protégé. Parent.
Child. Spouse. Best friend.
And even if, as some have argued, maintaining these
relationships reduces a person’s material or creative success, might
the trade be worth it?
“Who is there who would wish to be surrounded by all the riches
in the world and enjoy every abundance in life and yet not love or be
barry
(Barry)
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