MARCH 14 2020 LISTENER 29
Khalid Shah is part of a
multidisciplinary advisory
group set up to help the
Government and social-service
agencies provide culturally and
psychologically appropriate
services to those affected by
the shootings.
“The love and the support,
the people making a human
shield around the mosque – that helped
initially. But it takes a long time to get
through this – there is still a lot of unmet
need.”
Children in particular, he says, will
pick up on their parents’ fear. “And
any insecurity in the house adds to the
fear. Children born in New Zealand and
who grew up in New Zealand – their
understanding is different from their
parents who migrated here. They will hear
about these things, but it can be difficult
to encourage parents to allow children to
discuss them – people don’t come forward
and talk about the mental-health issues.”
A
mna Ali will not be taking
her three children to any
remembrance service marking oneyear since her husband, software engineer
Syed Jahandad Ali, had his life taken from
him. Her five-year-old daughter, who has
autism, is unaware of what happened. Her
15-month-old son is too young. Her three-
year-old daughter has been told her father
is in “God’s house”.
“We don’t tell her anything about
[the shootings]. We can protect her from
that information; we don’t show her
any pictures. When they understand
everything, when they are going to college
or university, then I can tell them. The
three-year-old asked a lot of questions
but now she has forgotten, I think, or she
doesn’t ask. That is why I don’t take my
kids to the anniversary – they show these
pictures, hard pictures.
“They are all in a good place – that is
what we believe, this is what comforts us.
Otherwise, it is very hard. Some people say
after time passes your pain will be gone- I don’t think so. It never finishes. It is
always in our heart.”
Twelve months ago, Sheikh Afraz told
the Listener he would not be telling his
young children why their father was away
supporting the many family members of
the Muslim community in Christchurch.
“I don’t want them to have anything
in their minds,” he said then. “Not this
shock, not this trauma.” He won’t be
attending any commemorative events, he
says now. His children are still
too young – they are eight and
four – and he doesn’t want
them to be pulled into feelings
of fear or hatred. “We don’t
want to remember that day – it
was the worst nightmare for
us. It happened, no one could
have controlled it. Talking
about it is like putting salt on
the cut again.”N
ow back living and working in
Christchurch, Abdallah Alayan
is inspired by the potential of
architecture to heal wounds and promote
well-being – physical, spiritual and social
well-being – for those of all, or no, faiths.
“We have a really conservative building
sector and we are really pragmatic about
things we design. That is something to be
proud of – spending too much money on
buildings is irresponsible when you think
of all our social issues – but in saying that,
there is a massive gap in poetic, narrative
architecture.”
If the stars aligned – if a charitable
organisation offered funding, if iwi
were happy and the Department of
Conservation gave the okay – Faith in
Fiordland might one day be built. But
in the meantime, Alayan is hopeful he
will have the opportunity to put forward
a proposal for a memorial. “I do have
ideas for something that is pared back
and poetic.” lRE
UT
ER
S;
CH
RIS(^) SL
AN
E
Public mourning:
flowers outside the
Al Noor Mosque;
below, Chris
Slane’s illustration
for the Listener.