GETTING A LEG UP ON BODY LANGUAGE 71was on one foot leaning toward her friend. I commented, “You ladies
must have known each other for a long time.” Their eyes and faces lit up,
and one asked how I knew this. I said, “Even though you were meeting
me—a stranger—for the first time, one of you crossed your legs to favor
the other. That is very unusual unless you really like and trust each other.”
They both giggled and one inquired, “Can you read minds, too?” To
which I laughed and answered, “No.” After I had explained what gave
their long-term friendship away, one of the two women confirmed they
had known each other since they were in grade school in Cuba in the for-
ties. Once again, the leg cross proved to be an accurate barometer of hu-
man sentiments.
Here’s an interesting feature of leg crossing. We usually do it subcon-
sciously in favor of the person we like the most. In other words, we cross
our legs in such a way so that we tilt toward the person we favor. This
can provide some interesting revelations during family gatherings. In
families in which there are multiple children, it is not unusual to have a
parent reveal a preference for one child over another by crossing legs so
that they tilt toward the child they favor.
Be aware that sometimes criminals, when they are up to no good,
will lean against a wall with their legs crossed when they see police driv-
ing by, pretending to be cool. Because this behavior goes counter to the
threat the limbic brain is sensing, these criminals usually don’t hold this
behavior for very long. Experienced officers on the beat can immediately
see that these subjects are posing, not reposing, but to the unknowing,
they may look erroneously benign.
Feet /Leg Displays During CourtshipDuring high-comfort social interactions, our feet and legs will mirror
those of the other person we are with (isopraxis) and will remain playful.
In fact, in the extreme stages of comfort during courtship, the feet will
also engage the other person through subtle foot touches or caresses (see
box 16).
During courtship, and particularly while seated, a woman will often