“How does this help? I mean, how does doing this negative activ-
ity lead to anything positive?” The mercury dropped another two
degrees.
“Yes, I agree,” said a female bond manager, “I don’t think this
is going to accomplish anything.” Cooler still. Almost immediately,
several other participants chimed in with similar concerns.
I waited for the other side of the argument to surface, as it
always does. Sure enough, a female secretary raised her hand and
said, “I took a course on diversity at Oakton Community College
last semester, and we did an exercise just like this. It turned out to
be very useful.”
I waited to see how the detractors would handle her comment.
After all, it’s hard to refute someone who has actually done the
exercise and benefited from it. That testimony tends to carry more
weight than people who are merely finding fancy ways to say, “This
makes me uncomfortable, so I’d rather not do it.”
The secretary’s comment hung in the air for a moment, and
then the bond woman said: “I don’t mean to be insulting but...
Oakton Community College?” She looked around the room for
support from her fellow dissenters. “I’m not sure we should draw
too many conclusions from a course at a community college.”
Needless to say, the secretary was flabbergasted at that remark,
as was I. In one breathtaking moment, the bond woman had proven
the point beyond any doubt: We all need to examine our preju-
dices, so they don’t embarrass us when we least expect it.
My point in telling this story is to show what an unsafe envi-
ronment looks like. The secretary stated her opinion, without at-
tacking the other side, and was met with a painful personal assault
about her choice of educational establishments. How likely is it
that this secretary will feel free to share other personal opinions
and feelings that run counter to the group’s conscience? The phrase
“cold day in hell” comes to mind.
Comparing this diversity experience with safer ones is instruc-
tive. The safe groups encourage participants to share their personalCreating a Safe Place 14114-25 ware 141 1/19/01, 1:14 PM