APRIL 2019 WOMEN’S HEALTH / 10 3intensive hike up two “14ers”
(mountain slang for Colorado’s mul-tiple peaks exceeding 14,000 feet).
I’d spent months training for each of
the three events, dedicating week-days and Saturdays to workouts
and Sundays to recovery—or self-
care, as we call it: I foam-rolled,pretzeled my limbs in candlelit yoga,
read novels in bed, splurged on
$11 smoothies, slathered my skinand hair in masks...you know,
the works. Yet even on my most Zen
days, nothing came close to theperfect peace I felt after pushing my
body to a point it had never been.
At first, the fitness editor in mechalked up the bliss to endorphins.
But as I melted into the massage
table at Connecticut’s sereneMayflower Inn & Spa one day post-
marathon, oh-so-sore but—for the
first time since the Colorado hikesix weeks prior—completely stress-
free, I suspected there was a muchdeeper force at play.
I was right. “Self-care isn’t just
about treating yourself—it’s about im-proving yourself, which is what truly
makes us feel good about who we
are,” says mind-body expert JosephCardillo, author of Body Intelligence.
“Tackling a serious physical chal-
lenge, especially one that involvesconsistent training, is one of the best
steps you can take to increase your
pride.” (P.S. “Serious” doesn’t have tomean mountains and marathons;
it might be a 10-K or a yogi head-stand.) Why the big impact? Partly
because you can literally see yourself
improve. I remember the euphoricsatisfaction I felt when I finally hit
18 miles, my “scary mileage” (much
like a “scary age”), then surpassedit three times during my marathon
training. But it’s also because the
greater the challenge, the greater thereward. Trekking the first 14er was
incredible—a cardio feat I wasn’t
sure my sea level–accustomed bodycould manage. But summiting the
second one left me feeling unstoppa-
ble, capable of anything.“When you tolerate a situation
that scares you, and do so long
enough that you’re able to changethe self-doubting, self-judging,
‘who do I think I am?’ script we allknow too well, that’s self-care at its
finest,” says Elvira G. Aletta, PhD,
a clinical psychologist in Buffalo,New York. “You develop a profound
type of trust, the kind that comes
from overcoming fear, listening toyour body, and becoming your own
cheerleader. And it compounds
with each mini event leading up tothe main one.” It’s an expanding
cycle of growth: Trust builds confi-
dence, confidence builds self-worth,self-worth builds self-love, and
self-love builds, well, a stronger,
more compassionate, better you.Plus, if you’re working through an
emotionally taxing life experience—
in my case, a bad breakup—thepursuit and achievement of sweaty,
dirty, happy goals can be especiallynurturing. “The mind-body
connection is a two-way street,”
Cardillo says—as in, just as yourhead can dictate your athletic limits,
seeing how far you can physically gowill help you realize your incredible
inner strength. He’s spot-on about
the parallel. No amount of essentialoils helped me get over my ex, but
as I pushed myself forward with
each step, I couldn’t help but feel asif I were leaving him and our toxic
past behind. If that’s not self-care,
I don’t know what is.While I’m not sure what my
next proverbial finish line will be,
I am certain of this: I will believe Idid that. Because I’ve finally learned
what it means to not just care for
myself, but to care about myself.And there’s no room for “can’t” in
that picture.NO SWEAT? NO SWEAT.
There’s catharsis in movement, Cardillo
says, but your challenge doesn’t have
to be physical. Anything beneficial that
improves you—going back to school,
conquering a fear of heights—
counts as meaningful self-care.
Expand your definition of this buzzword. It’s not just about feels-good-
in-the-moment pampering. It’s actively pursuing growth, which gives you
a long-lasting lift and helps you recognize how amazing you are.self-care
N
Y
RR