Reader\'s Digest Canada - 04.2020

Eventually I got myself in place,
hunched over with my kneecaps level
in front of the doorframe, with Barry
behind me. I tried to unfocus my eyes
so I couldn’t see the opening and the
endless air next to me, the ground far
below. Over the roar of the wind and
the plane, Barry shouted last-minute
adjustments to the pilot, getting us
lined up just right. “Give me five left!
Five right!” The seconds stretched out
while I fought the urge to quit. I had
the sensation of trying to hold up some
massive weight, my strength ebbing
away, moment by moment.

Finally, Barry put his right foot out
on the narrow metal step fixed to the
plane’s fuselage, below the open door
frame, and yelled for me to do the
same. It took me three tries—the wind
first blew my foot behind, then in front,
before I finally lodged it against his.
Next I had to scooch around so my left
knee pointed out over the lip of the
doorway and lock both my hands onto
my harness, gripping a pair of handles
at shoulder height. I was glad to have
something to hold on to. Ever since
Barry had promised to snap my finger
bones if need be, I’d had a recurring

vision of myself reaching out in panic

as we exited the plane and fastening

on to the door frame or a strut with a

vise grip fuelled by fear, pulling the

Cessna off balance and risking every-

one’s lives.

We were halfway out of the plane,

perched on the very edge of jumping.

I was past the bail-out point now. I

closed my eyes and tried not to hyper-

ventilate, tried not to think about what

was coming.

All I could do was stay limp and trust

Barry to get us in the air—actually par-

ticipating in our exit from the plane

was beyond me. I felt him rocking back

and forth to get our momentum up,

heard him yell something, but I was

deep in my own head. Then we rolled

out of the plane and into space.

Barry had urged me to keep an eye

on the Cessna as I somersaulted out of

it. Watching the plane appear to fall

away from you when you were the one

plummeting was, he assured me, one of

the coolest parts of a jump. But I had

no desire to watch the earth and the

sky spin around me. I kept my eyes

shut hard until I could feel that Barry

had stabilized us in free fall.

I WAS PAST THE BAIL-OUT POINT

NOW. I CLOSED MY EYES AND TRIED

NOT TO HYPERVENTILATE.

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