T3 - UK (2020-05)

If you don’t mind ripping out

your current porcelain, Washloo

does a line of remote control

all-in-one smart toilets

NOW PLAYING

A

Guru always puts his trust

in the wisdom of crowds,

unless they’re those crowds

that hang around outside the gates

of his palatial estate campaigning

for him to switch off his ‘unsafe’ and

‘ill-conceived’ gadget incinerator.

Those guys don’t know what

they’re talking about.

The crowds to listen to, in this

case, should probably be those

dedicated fitness-dudes out there

that use Strava. Every time a bit of

data is logged, be it a run, swim,

cycle or ski, it’s painted onto a heat

map that you can view at

strava.com/heatmap – seek out the

hottest areas, though do bear in

mind that only Strava subscribers

can zoom as low as street level.

I want the

Japanese toilet

experience!

My noise

cancelling ear

buds don’t work

Where’s best for

a bike ride?

A

Aside from hiring your own

bidet butler (turnover in

that position is incredibly

high) you’ll likely be looking at an

add-on; Washloo’s range of smart

seats ranges from around £500 to

£800, though if you catch a sale

you might save £100 or so.

If you’re fitting a new bathroom,

or don’t mind ripping out your

current porcelain, Washloo also

does a line of remote control

all-in-one smart toilets, which come

in around £1,700 – and bathroom

companies like Victoria Plumb are

offering their own smart options

too. You’ll be clean enough to eat

your dinner off.

A

GaGu can assure you that

they (probably) work just

fine – what you’re hearing is

the disgusting sound of the inside

of your own head. Blood pumping,

saliva sloshing, bones clicking, the

kinds of thing that any well-fitted

ear bud tends to highlight. When

you forcibly extract the sound of

the outside world, the effect is

simply heightened.

You may find that a hybrid ear

bud, which listens both on the

inside and the outside of the ear

canal, is a better choice, but it’ll be

only a slight difference at best. If

it’s a real problem, ANC cans are

a little friendlier; Sony’s WH-

1000XM3 (£330) are the best

you can get today.

JON PARKS, JERSEY

ABOVE

Noise cancelling:

be alone with

your thoughts –

and the burbling

sound of gunk

inside your head

STEPHEN FRANKS,

CO DURHAM

Don’t miss another

instalment of the

legendary Gadget Guru!

SUBSCRIBE

TODAY!

bit.ly/t3subscribe

DUNCAN DODDS,

SUNDERLAND

THE OTHER LATIF

WNYC’s Radiolab presents a

brilliant years-long deep dive

into presenter Latif Nasser’s

namesake, a prisoner in

Guantanamo Bay. A clever and

thought-provoking podcast.

THE SLOW RUSH

Tame Impala’s new album takes

them still further away from

their roots and into an almost

disco vapourwave swirl – not

that Guru’s pink-and-cyan

brain is complaining in any way.

CROCODILE DUNDEE

Paul Hogan’s finest hour: a

stupid film that doesn’t stand

up to the standard of today’s

movies but one which, if

you’re flicking through Netflix

anyway, you should watch.

NEW MEDIA

26 T3 MAY 2020

Horizon

Guru finds the best

media you need on

your various screens