SECTION 2 : BEREAVEMENT COUNSELING – A FRAMEWORK
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Elizabeth Kubler-Ross has taught us that we must see the griever as an expert who we allow
to teach us what their experience is, rather than walk into each counseling session with an
expectation about what should happen or what they may be feeling. You are not the expert of
another person's grief.
The Companioning Model of Bereavement caregiving developed by Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt is
one in which we, as bereavement caregivers, help people to integrate life’s losses by being
present to them and observing them-companioning. He tells us that observance comes to us from
the ritual. It means not only “to watch out for,” but “to keep and honor, to bear witness.” Wolfelt
elaborates on the companioning idea:
➢ Companioning is about learning from others; it is not about teaching them.
➢ Companioning is about walking alongside; it is not about leading.
➢ Companioning is about being still; it is not about frantic movement forward.
➢ Companioning is about discovering the gifts of sacred silence; it is not about filling every
painful moment with words.➢ Companioning is about listening with the heart; it is not about analyzing with the head.
➢ Companioning is about bearing witness to the struggles of others; it is not about directing
those struggles.➢ Companioning is about being present to another person’s pain; it is not about taking away
the pain.Utilizing this model of bereavement caregiving, the helper:
➢ Listen in a supportive manner to individuals’ concerns.
➢ Helps disaster survivors recognize that, in most cases, their emotional reactions are
natural, normal, and to be expected.➢ Assists survivors to reduce additional stress by organizing and prioritizing day-to-day and
recovery-related tasks.