12 ST THE NEW YORK TIMES, SUNDAY, JUNE 28, 2020Most of us have come to expect reality tele-
vision stars to be anything but real. Yet Lau-
ren Speed, 34, and Cameron Hamilton, 29,
Atlanta-based newlyweds who became
breakout stars on the hit Netflix dating
show “Love Is Blind” have proven to be the
real deal. Since their TV debut earlier this
year, where they got engaged sight unseen,
the couple have become YouTubers, pro-
ducing content for their show, Hanging with
the Hamiltons, which has more than
600,000 subscribers. In recent weeks, Ms.
Speed, a digital content creator and former
model, and Mr. Hamilton, a fireman turned
artificial intelligence professional, have had
to tackle tough conversations about racism,
while also navigating the obstacles that
come with being an interracial couple.
Difficult Conversations
The days following the death of George
Floyd, who was killed in police custody in
Minneapolis, and the preceding deaths of
Breonna Taylor and Ahmaud Aubrey, led to
protests around the world, including in their
hometown, Atlanta. None of this makes for
a sexy conversation with a spouse, but the
Hamiltons are figuring out how to discuss
these important events.
“They’re just real conversations we have
to have,” Ms. Speed said. “This is nothing
new for black people. This whole grief, this
sadness, this frustration has been going on
since we’ve been in this country. Right now
it’s so important for him to just listen. That
is what black people want. We want to be
heard. We want you to hear how we feel.”
Mr. Hamilton is listening, and together
they use their platform to share resources,
donate to relevant organizations and con-
tact politicians to demand policy reform. “I
can’t pretend to understand what it’s like to
be black and go through this,” Mr. Hamilton
said. “I ask myself, ‘What is it that I can do
to be of service?’ I’m constantly reminded
that listening is one thing I always need to
practice. Listening, and understanding
what I can do to help.”
Preparing for ‘The Talk’
While the Hamiltons are smitten with their
dog, Sparx, they intend to expand their fam-
ily in the near future. They know that doing
so will come with challenges beyond late-
night feedings and diaper changes. “Par-
ents begin having conversations with their
children about interaction with law enforce-
ment in black households at 6 years old,”
Ms. Speed said. “Of course it’s a hard con-
versation to have, especially as a white dad
and a black mom.” Mr. Hamilton added,
“Unfortunately I will be treated differently
by society than they will. That’s not right,
but we have to work toward a better future.
I will remind them that they are always
loved and we will do our best to protect
them."Clashing Over Chores
All couples have pet peeves, and some
would argue that differences are actually
healthy for a romantic partnership. Howev-
er, those differences can seem more annoy-
ing after months in quarantine. Mr. Hamil-
ton leaving dishes in their kitchen sinksends Ms. Speed into a mini-panic. “Even
when he does wash the dishes, he’ll leave
the wet dishrag there to mildew and mold,”
she said. “Another thing Cam does that
drives me crazy is taking the last piece of
paper towel or toilet tissue and leaving the
empty roll there.” Mr. Hamilton swiftly add-
ed, “There’s no rhyme or reason to the way
she loads the dishwasher. About 60 percent
of it is still empty.” Ms. Speed responds with
a chuckle, “As long as they get clean.”Cheesy Games for the Win
The Hamiltons have found fun ways to en-
tertain each other while staying indoors. “It
gets mundane if you have the same pattern,
so it’s cool to do something new together
like learn a new game,” Ms. Speed said.
“We’re obsessed with Cheez-Its.” The
couple came up with a silly yet sort of sexy
game to incorporate their favorite snack.“Basically one person throws a Cheez-It
and the other person opens their mouth and
tries to catch it.” They even found a way to
incorporate this new pastime into their
“Quarantine Diaries” series on their
YouTube channel.Taco Tuesday, and Beyond
“We definitely eat a lot of tacos,” Ms. Speed
said. “Sometimes we’ll have a margarita
night where we eat tacos and watch our fa-
vorite movies and shows.” The couple is
also putting one of their kitchen gadgets to
good use. “We have an air fryer, and it’s
heaven sent,” she said. “We literally use it
every day.”Creating Bathroom Bliss
“Lauren likes to take long baths,” Mr. Ham-
ilton said. “So I just sort of get that set up in
the bathroom for her — maybe put rose pet-
als in the bath and add some bath salts. It’s
kind of funny and maybe T.M.I., but our wa-
ter tank is really small so I have to heat up a
ton of water on the stove and run it upstairs.
It is a lot of effort but worth it.” Ms. Speed
appreciates the effort: “It is super sweet.”Difficult Topics, Lots of Tacos and Cheesy Games
By BRIDGETTE BARTLETT ROYALLThe couple have found
interesting ways to keep
themselves entertained at
home, including a game
involving the snack
Cheez-Its. “Basically one
person throws a Cheez-It
and the other person opens
their mouth and tries to
catch it,” Lauren Speed said.HOME TOGETHER
Two reality stars stay
busy, and keep racial
justice in mind.
Amy Shack Egan, the owner of Modern
Rebel, a wedding planning business in
Dumbo, Brooklyn, is not exactly a sports
fan. But in mid-April she watched the Mi-
chael Jordan documentary “The Last
Dance” with her husband. What was shap-
ing up to be the darkest Brooklyn wedding
season in memory suddenly looked
brighter.
“Somebody said to Michael Jordan when
his team was down in the third quarter,
‘We’ll get ’em next game,’ ” she said. “And
Michael Jordan said, ‘Next game? What
about the fourth quarter?’ ” For Ms. Shack
Egan, “a light bulb went off. I told my hus-
band, ‘I feel like the game’s not over. I’ve
just got to be more creative.’ ”
Ms. Shack Egan had already shown ini-
tiative in rallying her colleagues in the face
of coronavirus-induced ruin. Two weeks
earlier, she organized a Zoom call with 75
Brooklyn wedding vendors, including pho-
tographers, D.J.’s and florists, to discuss
how to navigate the collapse of wedding
season. The documentary energized her to
recruit them into a collective.
“We did a pivot to virtual and contact-free
weddings,” she said. “So many of our col-
leagues were willing to pivot with us. And
now things are starting to change.”
Since the end of April, Modern Rebel has
been coordinating weddings for couples
who are choosing to marry virtually or in
scaled-down gatherings. Clients — more
than a dozen so far — are sent a menu of
virtual add-ons to the base price of $399 that
includes invitations, a Zoom rehearsal and a
day-of timeline, and a silent stage manager
in the chat box to cue readings by virtual
guests. These add-ons range from two-hour
virtual dance parties hosted by popular
Brooklyn wedding D.J.s to custom poems
by Ars Poetica emailed to guests as favors,
or catered post-vows dinners for two from
partners like the Pixie and the Scout, a
Brooklyn-based caterer, delivered contact
free.
Vendors in other cities are joining forces
to salvage a wedding-season fourth quarter
that may have seemed beyond saving, too.
In Philadelphia, for example, “we’re rely-
ing on each other much more for business
advice, like what should we be telling our
clients or how should we be updating our
policies,” said Caitlin Maloney Kuchemba,
the owner of the Clover Event Company, a
boutique wedding planning business in
Norristown, Pa.
This camaraderie has been especially
helpful for handling clients looking to cele-
brate twice — once on their original wed-
ding date, and again in a bigger way in 2021,
when many expect social-distancing regu-
lations to be lifted. “People want to know,”
Ms. Kuchemba said, “Do we consider a
smaller celebration part of the original
event? Or is it a whole new event that re-
quires new contracts?”
A network of about 20 Philadelphia-area
vendors has arrived at pricing for what she
called “mini ceremonies” in a backyard or
living room, on a couple’s intended wedding
day. For the flowers, photography and co-
ordination, pricing starts at around $3,000.
Ms. Kuchemba has also formed an alli-
ance called 660 Collective with three other
vendors to provide micro-weddings for 10
guests or fewer, in a shared Norristown stu-
dio (weddings start at $3,500). And with
three different vendors, she formed a net-
work called the Gush to put on a free 2021
wedding for a pair of essential workers
nominated by the community.
“Gush came about after we started
speaking as a group about how Covid has
affected the industry,” Ms. Kuchemba said.
“When the virus first came, we were all in
reaction mode, figuring out postponements.
Now a lot of us in this area have pivoted to:
‘What can we do right now? What can we do
to give couples something to look forward
to?’ ”
In northern New Jersey, Ellen Hockley
Harrison, the owner of Greater Good
Events in Jersey City, is tightening her ties
to a group of vendors she liked working be-
fore the Covid-19 outbreak. “The idea of a
collective was something my team had
been discussing for quite some time, be-
cause we tend to try to work with women- or
minority-owned businesses, and we also try
to be on the eco-friendly side,” Ms. Hockley
Harrison said. She is now teaming up withabout eight businesses that fit those de-
scriptions to put on weddings that conform
to Gov. Philip D. Murphy’s guidelines. Cur-
rently, up to 10 people can gather for indoor
celebrations in New Jersey, and up to 25
outdoors.
“In the next six months, we think the
wedding industry is going to start opening
up but on a much smaller scale,” Ms. Hock-
ley Harrison said. “So right now, we’re pro-
viding resources to clients who come to us
saying, ‘OK, we’re ready to put on a wed-
ding for 25 guests or fewer.’ ” A small at-
home wedding package with her collective,
including a dress rental, flowers and table
arrangements, will cost about $3,500. If re-
strictions loosen, the group will work to-
gether to scale up. “The goal is to help make
the process less daunting for couples,” she
said. “Because right now everything is so
confusing.”
Some wedding-vendor alliances are be-
ing formed just to clear away this confusion.
In Atlanta, Laetitia Towson, the owner of
the event planning company House ofBASH, is on the phone daily with a loose col-
lective of nearby D.J.s, venue representa-
tives and other wedding professionals.
“We’re just trying to get a feel for what we
can and cannot do,” she said. Though Geor-
gia nightclubs have been allowed to reopen,
rules for weddings, she said, have not been
addressed by the governor or mayor. But
keeping up with social distancing and
crowd size mandates is not the only reason
the wedding community needs to stay in
touch.
“We’re hearing of catering companies go-
ing under, smaller shops going under, peo-
ple selling their businesses,” Ms. Towson
said. “It’s scary for couples, not knowing
what services are going to be available to
them if they postpone to 2021.”
It’s scarier still for small businesses
struggling to survive and unsure when so-
cial-distancing rules might be eased. The
Massachusetts Coalition of Wedding Ven-
dors, already 900 members strong, was
formed to get to the bottom of what rules are
currently governing Massachusetts wed-
dings and for how long.
“In general, we need some kind of guid-
ance,” said Nelly Saraiva, a wedding and
boudoir photographer in Acushnet, Mass.,
who started the collective in April. When
Gov. Charlie Baker recently released new
guidelines, she said, “it showed that some
outdoor weddings can begin to take place in
limited numbers when we get to Phase 3 of
reopening, but it doesn’t say what those
numbers are. It’s impossible for us to make
decisions and to help our couples make de-
cisions.”
The group has written letters to state rep-
resentatives asking for answers, not just
about wedding rules but also about finan-
cial help for ailing colleagues.
“Typically we wouldn’t talk about our in-
dividual policies for people demanding de-
posits back and that sort of thing, but now
we’re working together,” Ms. Saraiva said.
The shared concern will be especially
helpful when Massachusetts gatherings are
opened to more than 10 people.
“We’ll need to know things like, what if
I’m hired to take pictures for a wedding and
I’m stuck in a tiny hotel room with eight or
10 girls getting ready and there’s no social
distancing,” she said, expressing concerns
about who might be liable should clients fail
to follow social-distancing guidelines or
someone becomes ill. “Liability is a huge
thing for vendors.”
As eager as she and her colleagues are to
get back to work, Ms. Saraiva admits that if
she were a bride, she would postpone her
wedding until the pandemic fully passes. “I
wouldn’t want to worry about whether the
girls in the wedding party are going to be
willing to have their hair and makeup done
and then put a mask on, how many people
can sit at a table six feet apart, who’s in
charge of policing,” she said. “Right now, I
don’t see how we can get to a new normal.
But at least we’re all working closer togeth-
er now. That’s been a good thing.”During Social Distancing, Wedding Vendors Close Ranks
By TAMMY La GORCEAGP COLLECTIVEKate Chernow and Jake
McDonough were married
June 6 at the bride’s family
home outside Philadelphia.
The couple enlisted the help
of the Clover Event
Company, wedding planners
that work with a collective
of wedding vendors to
coordinate “mini
ceremonies.”Entrepreneurs decide to
get more creative, and
more collaborative.
Vows