TUESDAY, OCTOBER 20 , 2020. THE WASHINGTON POST EZ RE C5
Dear Amy: I’m a
22-year-old
woman, and I got
dumped last week
by my boyfriend
(he is 21). We had
been together for two months. It
was the most romantic and
happiest time for us both.
We made plans to spend our
lives together (getting married,
having kids, etc.).
His reason for the breakup was
to spend time on his own to deal
with his PTSD and depression
from an abusive relationship that
he got out of this year.
He called our relationship:
“right person, wrong time,” but I
asked him if the breakup was
permanent yesterday, and he said
it was. He said that when he feels
better, he’ll want a fresh start,
but I don’t understand. If I’m the
right person, then why is he
ending our relationship?
Whenever he said he loved me
or wanted a life with me and that
he has never been as in love until
me, I could tell he was telling the
truth. I love him so much and
this has affected me so badly. I
know he still loves me, so why is
he acting like he hates me right
now? He threatened to block me
on social media.
Can you help me?
— DevastatedDevastated: This guy is trying to
break up with you. Your job now
is to respect his choice, even if
you believe he is sending you a
mixed message.
However, he isn’t actually
sending you a mixed message.
“Right person, wrong time”
means: “I care about you, but I
am breaking up with you.”
“I need time on my own in
order to deal with my previous
trauma and depression” means:
“I am breaking up with you.”
Threatening to block you on
social media means, “I am
breaking up with you. Don’tattempt to communicate with
me. If I’m interested in reviving
our relationship, I’ll get in touch
with you.”
It is terrible, awful, and so
heartbreaking to be left behind,
especially after a passionate
crashing together that felt
perfect at the time. But you are
both young. Your relationship
might have burned too brightly.
Over the course of two months,
you two cycled through several
months’ worth of dynamics.
Please, take time to regroup.
Breakups can be devastating, but
they can also lead to personal
insight. Next time go slow.
Keep in mind this (somewhat
cheesy) saying that actually
helped me to recover from my
own long-ago divorce: If you love
someone, set them free. If they
come back, they’re yours. If they
don’t, they never were.”Dear Amy: One of my good
professional colleagues is namedKaren.
She is thoughtful,
conscientious, and considerate.
She is the very opposite of the
racist and demeaning “Karen”
stereotype that is getting so
much flak and attention right
now.
When she isn’t present in
meetings, colleagues make
“Karen” jokes, which I always try
to shoot down, but it still feels
awful.
Somehow, it seems worse,
since these remarks come from
my other colleagues who fancy
themselves to be liberal and
inclusive.
Recently, Karen really helped
me out by preventing me from
making a rather costly and
potentially serious professional
error.
Now I am feeling doubly guilty.
Is there anything else I can do to
improve the situation and stop
the stupid jokes?
— Feeling GuiltyFeeling Guilty: Making fun of
someone’s name is juvenile
bullying.
I suggest that you react to this
by speaking up and saying a
version of, “Really. This has
gotten so old. Can you please
stop?”
I posted an informal poll on
social media, asking Karens to
respond to your question about
“Karens.” About a dozen Karens
responded, evincing a sense of
humor about this, as well as an
attitude best described as: “Sigh.
This, too, shall pass.”
If any of this teasing takes
place in front of (your) Karen,
she might want to laugh it off
and demand: “I want to see the
manager. Wait, I am the
manager!” which is a very
“Karen” thing to do.Dear Amy: I have to admit that I
was shocked to see your lengthy
response to “Concerned Friend,”who reported that his male
friend was being physically
abused by his wife.
You are usually so biased,
sexist, and anti-male that I was
genuinely shocked to read your
affirmative response to this
question.
— Usually DisappointedUsually Disappointed: Yes, men
are (also) gravely affected by
intimate partner violence, and it
is devastating for both the
survivor and his friends and
family.
I feel thoroughly damned by
faint praise, but regardless, I
sincerely thank you.Amy’s column appears seven days a
week at washingtonpost.com/advice.
Write to [email protected] or
Amy Dickinson, P.O. Box 194,
Freeville, N.Y. 13068. You can also
follow her @askingamy.
© 2 020 by Amy Dickinson distributed by
Tribune Content AgencyWoman needs help translating her ex’s ‘right person, wrong time’ message
Ask Amy
AMY
DICKINSON
Dear Heloise: In
a recent column,
a reader
mentioned
finding an app
whereby television viewing was
possible on their smartphone.
You mentioned that was great,
but you were restricted to the
small screen. Actually, that
might not be true.
Many phones have the ability
to “cast” what is on the screen to
a smart TV. This allows the video
on the phone to be watched on
the larger screen of the
television. Ta blets frequently
have this ability too, as well as
direct cabling ability if they have
the appropriate output on the
tablet, an HDMI port.
One might need the assistance
of someone more tech savvy to
set this up, but it is not difficult
at all.
— David, via emailDear Heloise: I’m interested in a
laptop computer. What are some
features I should look for?
— Helen in ColoradoHelen in Colorado: Choosing
the right laptop computer for
you requires many
considerations. What will you be
using it for: playing games,
downloading videos and photos,creating documents, visiting
social media sites? How you plan
to use a laptop will determine
how much memory you’ll need
and how much processing speed
you will require. You’ll also want
to consider battery life,
especially if you’ll be away from
a power source for very long.
Before you decide, do your
research and talk with a
knowledgeable computer
salesperson about choosing the
right laptop for your needs and
budget.Dear Heloise: Your column is
appreciated, but it almost always
misuses the word “recycle.”Examples of recycling are
crushing/melting glass to make
new glass products, crushing/
melting aluminum cans to make
new metal products, melting
plastic jugs to make carpeting,
etc. People put items in bins to
be recycled, but they don’t
generally do recycling in their
homes.
What you are usually
promoting is “reuse.” Please see
the definitions of the following:
reduce, reuse and recycle.
Reducing is cutting back on
the amount of trash we make;
reusing is finding a new way to
use an item so that we don’t
have to throw it out; andrecycling is breaking down the
material to manufacture new
goods.
Please help us educate the
public about the three steps to a
better environment!
— Vale D.W., via emailDear Heloise: When I color my
hair, I don’t like getting the color
all over my neck as the hair
being treated touches the skin. I
simply fasten an old sock around
my neck with a safety pin, and
my neck stays stain-free.
— Christi, via emailDear Heloise: How do you
restore the fluffiness to terry-cloth bath towels that have
developed some stiffness over
time from their use?
— Stuart, via emailStuart: This should solve your
problem: Wash the bath towels
with no detergent, but instead,
add 1 cup of ammonia, then run
the towels through a second
rinse cycle.Heloise’s column appears six days a
week at washingtonpost.com/advice.
Send a hint to Heloise, P.O. Box
795001, San Antonio, TX 78279-
5000, or email it to
[email protected].
© 2020, King Features SyndicateTechnology hacks, the lowdown on recycling and a new use for an old sock
Hints
From
Heloise
MARYLAND
AMC Columbia 14
10300 Little Patuxent Parkway
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) 4:30-
6:55
The Croods (PG) 4:05-6:55
The War with Grandpa (PG)
4:10-7:10
The New Mutants (PG-13) 4:20
2 Hearts (PG-13) 4:15-7:05
Annabelle Comes Home (R)
6:45
Tenet (PG-13) 5:00-6:00
Unhinged (R) 7:05
Honest Thief (PG-13) 7:15
Yellow Rose (PG-13) 4:10-6:55
Tenet: The IMAX 2D Experience
(PG-13) 7: 00
Memories of Murder 7:30
The Kid Detective (R) 4:25-7:20
Honest Thief: The IMAX Experi-
ence (PG-13) 4:15
Honest Thief (PG-13) 6:15
AMC Loews St. Charles
Town Ctr. 9
11115 Mall Circle
The Croods (PG) CC: 4:30-7:15
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
4:30-5:30-7:15-8: 15
2 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 4:30-7:15
Annabelle Comes Home (R) CC:
5:00-8:00
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 4:00-7:30
Unhinged (R) CC: 7:30
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC: 4:15-
5:15-7:00-8:00
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: 4:45
Cinemark Egyptian 24 and XD
7000 Arundel Mills Circle
Ghostbusters (1984) (PG) 5:20
Beetlejuice (PG) 4:00
Harry Potter and the Chamber
of Secrets (PG) 6:30
Coco (2017) (PG) 4:50
The New Mutants (PG-13)
5:00-6:35-7:55
Halloween (2018) (R) 4:40-7:45
2 Hearts (PG-13) 4:15-7:15
Unhinged (R) 4:05-6:50
Honest Thief (PG-13) 6:20
Yellow Rose (PG-13) 4:10
The Shining (1980) 40th
Anniversary presented by
TCM 7 :00
Train to Busan Presents:
Peninsula 7:05
Infidel (R) 7:50
Star Wars: Episode V - The
Empire Strikes Back 40th
Anniversary (PG) 7:10
My People, My Homeland 5:30
Memories of Murder 7:30Private Watch Party 4:30-
5:15-8:00
The Kid Detective (R) 4:45-7:40
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) 4:25
Hocus Pocus (PG) 6:15
The War with Grandpa (PG)
4:20-5:55-7:20
Tenet (PG-13) 5:25-7:25
Honest Thief (PG-13) XD:
4:35-7:30
Tenet (PG-13) XD: 6:55
Honest Thief (PG-13) XD: 4:35-
7:30; 6:2 0
Hoyt's West Nursery Cinema 14
1591 West Nursery Road
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
4:00-6:4 0
The New Mutants (PG-13)
CC: 4:50
2 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 4:10-6:50
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 4:00-7:00
Unhinged (R) CC: 5:00-7:30
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
4:20-7:10
Infidel (R) CC: 7:30
The Kid Detective (R) CC:
4:40-7:20
Honest Thief (PG-13) OC;
CC: 7:20VIRGINIA
AMC Courthouse Plaza 8
2150 Clarendon Blvd.
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) CC: 6:00
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
6:45-7:4 5
2 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 7:15
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 7:30
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
7:00-8:00
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: 6:30
AMC Hoffman Center 22
206 Swamp Fox Rd.
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) CC: 4:30
The Croods (PG) CC: 3:30-6:2 0
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
3:15-4:15-4:45-5:15-6:10-7:15
The New Mutants (PG-13) CC:
3:00-5:30-8:00
Cut Throat City (R) 6:50
2 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 3:10-4:00-
4:45-6:15-7:40
Annabelle Comes Home (R) CC:
4:50-7:50
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 3:00-4:10-
6:30
Unhinged (R) CC: 3:50-6:40
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
4:00-7:00Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: 3:10
The Shining (1980) 40th Anni-
versary presented by TCM 6:30
A Mermaid in Paris (Une Sirène
à Paris) 3 :20-6: 10
Infidel (R) CC: 7:45
Star Wars: Episode V - The
Empire Strikes Back 40th Anni-
versary (PG) CC: 3:40-6:50
The Broken Hearts Gallery (PG-
13) CC: 3:45
Tenet: The IMAX 2D Experience
(PG-13) CC: 8:00
Memories of Murder 7:30
The Kid Detective (R) CC:
4:30-7:2 5
Honest Thief: The IMAX Experi-
ence (PG-13) CC: 5:00
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC: 3:15-
5:45-6:15-8:00
AMC Potomac Mills 18
2700 Potomac Mills Circle
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) CC: 6:50
The Croods (PG) CC: 6:20
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
6:00-7:20-8:00
The New Mutants (PG-13)
CC: 8:20
2 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 6:10-9:00
Annabelle Comes Home (R)
CC: 7:00Tenet (PG-13) CC: 6:40-8:30
Unhinged (R) CC: 8:40
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
6:05-8:50
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: 7:50
The Kid Detective (R) CC:
6:00-8:40
Honest Thief: The IMAX Experi-
ence (PG-13) CC: 7:40
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC: 6:30-
7:05-8:15
Memories of Murder 7:30
AMC Shirlington 7
2772 South Randolph St.
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) CC: 6:00
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
6:15-7:1 5
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 7:30
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
7:00-8:00
Infidel (R) CC: 7:45
AMC Tysons Corner 16
7850e Tysons Corner Center
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) CC:
4:05-6:25-8:50
The Croods (PG) CC: 4:35-7:5 5
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
4:10-5:10-6:20-7:50-9:00
The New Mutants (PG-13)
CC: 4:402 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 4:15-7:05
Annabelle Comes Home (R) CC:
5:30-8:25
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 4:20-7:20
Unhinged (R) CC: 7:40
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
5:45-8:45
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: 4:30
The Shining (1980) 40th Anni-
versary presented by TCM 7:00
My People, My Homeland
4:25-8:10
Tenet: The IMAX 2D Experience
(PG-13) CC: 5:20-8: 55
Memories of Murder 7:30
The Kid Detective (R) CC:
5:00-8:00
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC: 4:00-
4:45-6:45-7:45
AMC Worldgate 9
13025 Worldgate Drive
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) CC: 6:45
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
6:00-7:1 0
2 Hearts (PG-13) CC: 7:20
Annabelle Comes Home (R)
CC: 8:00
Tenet (PG-13) CC: 7:00
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC:
6:15-7:30
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: 7:45Alamo Drafthouse Cinema -
One Loudoun
20575 East Hampton Plaza
Jurassic Park (PG-13) 7:30
The Thing (1982) (R) 7:25
Shaun of the Dead (R) 7:00
Coco (2017) (PG) 4:25
The War with Grandpa (PG)
4:20-7:00
Tenet (PG-13) 6:30
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (R)
4:30-7:20
Star Wars: Episode V - The
Empire Strikes Back 40th
Anniversary (PG) 4:20
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) 4:35-
7:00
Hocus Pocus (PG) 4:15-7:30
Honest Thief (PG-13) 4:30-7:10
Angelika Film Center Mosaic
2911 District Ave
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC: (!)
4:30-5:20-7:10-8:15
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC: (!)
4:15-7:4 5
Vertigo (1958) (PG) OC: 7:00
The War with Grandpa (PG) CC:
(!) 5:00-8:00
Tenet (PG-13) 4:20-7:20
The Kid Detective (R) 5:30-8:10Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG)
4:45-7:45
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood
Prince (PG) 4:00
CMX Cinemas Village 14
1600 Village Market Boulevard
Unhinged (R) 4:40
Over the Moon7:20
Henchmen4:15
The War with Grandpa (PG)
4:20-5:10-6:10-6:50-7:50
2 Hearts (PG-13) 4:30-5:30-
7:10-8:10
Tenet (PG-13) 4:00-7:30
Infidel (R) 5:00-7:55
Honest Thief (PG-13) 4:10-5:20-
6:10-7:00-8:00
Ava (R) 6:40
The Call (NR) 4:50-7:40
Cinema Arts Theatre
9650 Main St
Tenet (PG-13) CC; DVS: 4:10
A Call to Spy (PG-13) CC:
10:20-1:20-4:20-7:30
Honest Thief (PG-13) CC; DVS:
10:00-12:10-2:25-4:40-7:0 0
Yellow Rose (PG-13) CC; DVS:
9:55-12:15-2:35-4:55-7:4 0
Kajillionaire (R) CC; DVS: 10:05-
1:00-7:20On the Rocks (R) CC; DVS:
10:10-1:10-4:30-7:10
Cinemark Fairfax Corner and XD
11900 Palace Way
Halloween (2018) (R) 4:30-7:10
2 Hearts (PG-13) 4:20-6:55
Honest Thief (PG-13) 4:00-6:30
The Shining (1980) 40th Anni-
versary presented by TCM 7:00
Infidel (R) 4:35-7:15
Memories of Murder 7:30
Private Watch Party 4:15-5:30-
6:15-7:05
Tim Burton's The Nightmare
Before Christmas (PG) 4:55-
7:35
The War with Grandpa (PG)
4:10-5:15-7:40
Tenet (PG-13) 6:00
Honest Thief (PG-13) XD:
5:00-7:30
Tenet (PG-13) XD: 4:25-7:45
University Mall Theatre
10659 Braddock Road
Hocus Pocus (PG) CC; DVS:
4:00-7:00
Coco (2017) (PG) CC; DVS: 4:30
The New Mutants (PG-13) CC;
DVS: 4:15-7: 15
The Last Shift (R) CC; DVS: 7:30MOVIE DIRECTORY (!) No Pass/No Discount Ticket
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