Men's Health - UK (2019-07)

MEN’S HEALTH 95

body anxiety, and there are more sexual

communication difficulties. Blaming

porn alone is ideological.”

It’s a sentiment echoed by Moyle.

“There is some validity in the porn theory,

but pornography isn’t the sole problem.

Reports of stress and anxiety in younger

people are at an all-time high. But sexual

problems remain undiscussed. This can

contribute to more anxiety. It’s a vicious

cycle of dysfunction and anxiety.”

That cycle of shame and dysfunction

it out myself.” John estimates that he

has taken somewhere in the region of

50-100 illegally procured ED meds in

his adult life. When asked if he knows

about the risks – excessive doses due to

inaccurate labelling of active ingredients,

contamination with toxins, fake drugs –

he sweats. “No, I didn’t know that.”

In this respect, companies such as

Many have the potential to do a lot

of good. “Of course, we make buying

these drugs easier,” says Bruni. “And

we understand the concerns around

the products we sell, but what we sell is

regulated. We’re also trying to be a part

of this conversation for the better. Men

me using it or anything like that, but I
do think it’s the reason why I have this
recurring problem in relationships –
a super-quick honeymoon period when
I want loads of sex, then I can’t get hard
after a few weeks. I think porn has made
me bored on some kind of deeper level.”
That boredom has resulted in a
particularly millennial type of ED – one
that is “cured” by the excitement of a new
partner, who can match the thrill that
Kevin, now 29, more regularly gets from
opening a new tab on RedTube. But then
the feeling quickly subsides, and he is no
longer able to become aroused by that
partner. “I was with my ex for three years.
We had sex maybe three times during
the last two. I could get it up for porn, but
not for her. I felt guilty all the time, and it
made me lash out. It was a nightmare.”
The almost limitless choice offered
by internet porn can evidently dampen
your ability to enjoy “normal” intercourse.
“It sets the bar too high,” says Dr Knight.
“Nothing will do it for you any more.” In
response, websites such as Your Brain
on Porn and ED forums on Reddit have
emerged – communities built around the
shared experience of a disorder dubbed
“porn-induced erectile dysfunction”.
The former group, in particular, has
been on a mission to raise awareness
about what it considers to be a clear link
between porn use and sexual dysfunction:
“Other than the advent of streaming porn
in 2006,” it argues, “no variable related to
youthful ED has appreciably changed in
the last 10-20 years.”
But this view is not without its critics.
There are statisticians who prescribe

100%

A HARLEY STREET MEDICAL

CLINIC HAS REPORTED A

100% RISE IN REFERRALS

FOR THOSE SEEKING PORN-

ADDICTION TREATMENT

Erectile Dysfunction

“There is a real

link between

your mental

state and sex”

a healthy dose
of caution even
when appraising
such seemingly
irrefutable “facts”.
One of those
sceptics is Dr

as it increases

the temptation

to seek a pill

instead of

investigating

the true

causes of

our problems. Yet there’s a degree

of unrealistic expectation here. The

statistics don’t lie: men are putting

themselves at risk by buying unregulated

meds every day. It’s hardly likely that

they’ll all suddenly run to the doctor just

because they’ve been told to.

So, could this new wave of start-ups

provide a solution for people like John,

at least in the short term? “The thing

that annoys me most is this exaggerated

acceptance: ‘We get why you’re sad

about ED. Come and talk to your doctor

about it,’” John says. “It’s bullshit,

really. I’m not going to sit down and talk

to someone when it’s simpler to sort

Justin Lehmiller – erstwhile teacher at
Harvard and currently a research fellow
at the Kinsey Institute – whose work on
sex and psychology has been published
in every major journal on human sexuality.
Dr Lehmiller’s intention hasn’t been
to debunk the numbers, so much as
pour cold water over the hysteria. “Some
people are looking at data points that
aren’t high quality,” he says. “I have no
strong personal opinion. I’m a scientist.
What I have is more of a hypothesis.
It’s not just about porn. There are more
people on antidepressants, there’s more

is what has led

many men to the

back alleys of the

internet, choosing

to buy knock-off

Viagra from the

dark web and fake

pharmacies. Last

year, the UK’s

Border Force confiscated more than

£13m worth of illicit ED meds – 84% of

the entire value of illegal and unlicensed

meds seized in 2018. Embarrassment, it

seems, overrides caution.

The Only Way Is Up

This is where start-ups such as Many

have been able to muscle in on the action.

It’s a millennial solution to a millennial

problem, with mainstream tech offering

the benefits of the illegal route – discretion,

next-day delivery – but with the safety and

legitimacy of a genuine pharmacy.

Some experts, including Lehmiller,

believe that easy access to these

medications isn’t inherently helpful,

can pathologise a thing

that’s normal – like

not being able to get

it up from time to time.

We’re not for those

men. We never push

pills on people who

don’t need them, and

our consultation only

allows people who do to buy them.”

Shades of Grey

Perhaps what we need, more than

anything, is a new classification that isn’t

as binary as “ED or no ED”. “Maybe young

men have the wrong idea of what ED is,”

says Lehmiller. “If the penis isn’t doing

what they want it to every time, they think

there’s a problem. But it’s normal for men

not to always maintain an erection.”

In a way, that’s just life. “Sometimes,

life is just hard. It’s stressful, and you’re

tired, and you can’t go to the gym,” says

Dr Knight. “No drug or therapy can make

all of that go away, and they can even be

counterproductive.” Curiously, where

he does see the benefit of medication is

as Viagra for the ego. “I might see a young

guy and give him one or two pills, and

that’s it. ED is so often a confidence thing.

You have it once, then it’s stuck in your

head. A couple of times on Viagra and

boom! You’ve got your confidence back.”

Erectile dysfunction among healthy

men, it seems, could be all in the mind:

another side-effect of our many mental

health issues, alongside anxiety,

depression and body dysmorphia. “We

are starting to talk about many of these

things,” says Moyle. “We’re just not there

yet when it comes to sex.” Society’s shifting

attitude to mental health, then, offers the

best lesson: to break down the stigma, first

we must challenge the judgements we

make in our own minds. And until we do

that? The statistics suggest the bedroom

downturn will only continue.