Revising / 37• Have I avoided dangling modifiers? [See dangling modifier in the Glossary.]
• Have I avoided ambiguous modifiers? [See ambiguity in the Glossary.]STEP 5: Checking Consistency
The next thing you should check is consistency: consistent point of view and consis-
tent verb tense. [See shifts, confusing, in the Glossary.] If, for instance, you begin a
formal essay with a third-person point of view, you must maintain this point of view
throughout. The questions you should ask about consistent point of view include the
following:
• Have I used the point of view most appropriate for the purpose of my work?
For instance, using second-person point of view results in finger-pointing
didactic writing and may not endear you to your audience. A third-person
point of view appears more formal, less personal. A first-person point of view
is usually reserved for narratives or short stories, usually too informal for
classroom work.
• Have I maintained a consistent point of view throughout the writing?Next, check for consistent verb tense. For instance, if you began your paper in the
present tense, then unless you are using a flashback, you must maintain the present
tense throughout the paper.
SAMPLE REVISIONS
Now that you are familiar with the process of revision, study the following samples.
They apply some of the more complicated steps above. The examples show changes
in specific detail, unity, transition, sentence variety, and emphasis, and then ana-
lyze the reasons for these changes. Note that the revisions read more smoothly, with
greater clarity and emphasis.
SAMPLE REVISIoN foR SPECIfIC DETAIL
The following passage [an excerpt from the sample paper included in Writing a Multi-
Paragraph Paper in Chapter 2] illustrates the difference between a paragraph with
and without specific detail.
Original Passage
In spring, the fishermen replace the hunters on Hovey Lake waters. They come to catch big
stringers of fish in the early spring. Some are more successful than are others. They use all
kinds of methods to try to catch fish. Only when the lake closes do the fishermen leave.