280 Appendix B^ Sample Speeches
and test taking. They typically experience a drop in test scores in the first six months of
bereavement, and a timely response by institutions is warranted.
Finally, there are spiritual effects. Bereaved students ask “why?” and begin to
question their assumptions about reality, fairness, and goodness.
Now that we understand the extent of the problem and its effect on students, let’s
discuss what can be done.
First, I propose that the university hire a bereavement specialist who would work
with campus personnel to design a program for educating professors, Residence Life
personnel, and Resident Assistants in ways they can assist grieving students. This would
include annual professional workshops on grief and grieving.
Second, many students feel more comfortable expressing their grief in an infor-
mal environment with someone who has had a similar experience. The bereavement
specialist would recruit students who have skillfully walked through grief to be peer
counselors; these students can further process their own experience when they mentor
fellow students.
There is a model for this. Georgetown University is the home of the National
Students of Ailing Mothers and Fathers (AMF) Support Network. It was started by
David Fajgenbaum, whose phone call came July 17, 2003. His mother had stage four
brain cancer, and she died while he was still a student. The group’s name Ailing Mothers
and Fathers (AMF) includes his mother’s (Anne Marie Fajgenbaum) initials: A.M.F. The
group’s website says its mission is to support all grieving college students, to empower
them to fight back against terminal illnesses, and to raise awareness about the needs of
grieving college students.
Our university’s Health and Counseling Center’s web page states its goal as
“Helping students stay healthy so they may achieve the highest personal growth and
intellectual success.” Providing effective resources for grieving students, allows these
students to achieve their highest personal growth and intellectual success. David
Balk says:
Rather than deciding that bereaved college students are on their own and merely
wish them good luck, we should make the effort to determine whether appropriate
institutional responses can be put in place to help students get beyond a life event
that can obstruct their best academic performance and may ultimately affect a
school’s retention and graduation rates.
So we have the opportunity to make a difference in the lives of hundreds of students
on our campus. This number may be as high as 720 undergraduates each year. Creating
a grief support program would further the university’s commitment to holistic health
for all students.
Today we’ve seen there is a significant need and that grief affects a student’s ability
to be a competent scholar. However, specialists can make a difference, and it’s been done
before.
I hope that none of you get that devastating, life-changing phone call during your
college career. But I hope that if you do, a program will be in place to help you work
through the grief that inevitably follows.References
Balk, D. (2001). College student bereavement, scholarship and the university: A call for university engagement.
Death Studies, 25, 67–84.
Balk, D. (2008, Spring). Grieving: 22 to 30 percent of all college students. New Directions for Student Services,
121, 5–14.
Berson, R. (1988). A bereavement group for college students. Journal of American College Health, 37.
Cusick, A. (2007). Death response plans in universities: A structural approach. Unpublished manuscript.
Floerschinger, D. (1991). Bereavement in late adolescence: Interventions on college campuses. Journal of
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