80 Time February 15/February 22, 2021
There was one moment that spoke to
me: the experience of Barack being
on the campaign trail and you flying
in with maybe one or two members of
your team, rushing to an event, you all
doing your own hair and makeup. There
have been times where to speak I’ve
taken the train, had to do my makeup
and hair in a Starbucks, walked myself
to the venue, and then I’m performing
in front of 1,000 people. When you’re
first rocketed into a type of visibility,
you’re trying to represent your best self
without having the best resources. For
Black women, there’s also the politics
of respectability— despite our best at-
tempts, we are criticized for never being
put-together enough; but when we do,
we’re too showy. We’re always walk-
ing this really tentative line of who we
are and what the public sees us as. I’m
handling it day by day. I’m learning that
“No” is a complete sentence. And I am
reminding myself that this isn’t a com-
petition. It’s me following the trajectory
of the life I was meant to lead.
I’d love to hear more about your fam-
ily. As you know, I have two daugh-
ters around your age, and their bond
was always strong, but I’d be lying
if I said they didn’t have their ups
and downs here and there. They’re
sisters—What do you expect? You’re
a twin, which is a different ball game
in some ways. What does sisterhood
mean to you and your twin?
As twins, we’re actually pretty dissimi-
lar. But what bonds us isn’t our person-
alities; it’s our values. We’ve been raised
like you, by a strong Black woman who
taught us to value our ideas and our
voices. It’s really interesting when you
have two daughters, especially two
Black daughters close in age, because
they’re kind of operating as—I don’t
want to say each other’s mothers but—
sisters and then some. If I act out of line,
the first person who’s going to know
about it is my sister, and vice versa.
Oh, I hear that—not just as a mother
but as a sibling myself. My older
brother Craig and I have been close
since the day I was born. I know he’s
got my back, but he’s going to make
sure I keep my head on straight too.
And when I start to feel down, he’s
there to help me keep my chin up. I
wonder: Do you consider yourself an
optimist? And if so, how do you hold
on to that in hard times?
Definitely. Optimism shouldn’t be seen
as opposed to pessimism, but in conver-
sation with it. Your optimism will never
be as powerful as it is in that exact mo-
ment when you want to give it up. The
way we can all be hopeful is to not ne-
gate the feelings of fear or doubt, but
to ask: What led to this darkness? And
what can lead us out of the shadows?One last question: Do you have any
advice for young girls, and Black girls
in particular, who earn their way into
the spotlight?My question is do they have any advice
for me. I’m new to this, so I’m still learn-
ing. I would say anyone who finds them-
selves suddenly visible and suddenly
famous, think about the big picture. Es-
pecially for girls of color, we’re treated
as lightning or gold in the pan—we’re
not treated as things that are going to
last. You really have to crown yourself
with the belief that what I’m about and
what I’m here for is way beyond this
moment. I’m learning that I am not
lightning that strikes once. I am the hur-
ricane that comes every single year, and
you can expect to see me again soon.Obama is a former First Lady and the
author of BecomingLike Obama,
Gorman
studied
sociology. “I’m
writing about
race, sexism
and social
change—I
better do my
homework.”The Black Renaissance INTERVIEW