The Guardian Weekend - UK (2021-02-27)

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1 Which computer
pioneers brawled
in a Cambridge pub
in 1984?
2 What is the alabai,
honoured by
a golden statue in
Turkmenistan?
3 Who was the
legendary Christian
ruler of the East?
4 Which author of
A Serious Proposal
is hailed as the fi rst
English feminist?
5 What is Europe’s
largest bank by
asset value?
6 What body
tissue is named
from the Latin
for mouse?
7 What boasts
of “over one
billion edits”?
8 Which rappers
were pardoned by
President Trump?

What links:
9 Got; also; golfer’s
warning; consumed;
German refusal?
10 Zander;
bitterling;
sunbleak;
pumpkinseed?
11 Maeshowe;
Ring of Brodgar;
Stones of Stenness;
Skara Brae?
12 Russia (1 and 9);
Canada (2 and 39);
China (3 and 1);
US (4 and 3)?
13 Prominence;
chromosphere;
diamond ring;
Baily’s beads?
14 Huddersfi eld
Town; Arsenal;
Liverpool;
Manchester United
(twice)?
15 Pierre Curie;
Antoni Gaudi;
Roland Barthes?

Though I am a huge fan of parochial wars over
loud fl ute-playing dominating local newspapers ,
and adore a pointless petition, generally, the more
extreme the pettiness the greater the delight I take.
I feel sick whenever I consider Saudi Arabia ’s regime,
but when the Saudis threatened to dig a canal and
turn their nemesis nation Qatar into an island , I could
only gasp in admiration at the level of pettiness.
Politics lends itself brilliantly to pettiness. After being sacked
as education secretary by Theresa May in 2016, Nicky Morgan
responded with a barb about May wearing a pair of £995
leather trousers for a photoshoot. Morgan was then
disinvited from a meeting at Downing Street.
The pettiest person in the world is Donald Trump. It
is the only thing to recommend him. The nicknames he
gives to his adversaries are wonderful examples
of the genre. Perhaps the standout was when
he started calling Kim Jong-un “ little
r o c k e t m a n ”.
Brexit, meanwhile, is foreign policy via the
medium of petty. Nigel Farage deploys similar
tactics to Trump. But the remainer camp projecting

Crossword by Sy Quiz by Thomas Eaton


Answers on page 47

Across
7 Sultanate that is
sometimes known
as the Abode of
Peace (6)
8 Dame Zandra ......,
fashion designer (6)
9 Site of the Taj
Mahal (4)
10 Scottish
celebration of the
new year (8)
11 See 18
13 Indian state
bordering Nepal (5)
15 Bevelled plank for
making a barrel - or
fi vel horizontal lines
in music notation (5)
17 Indian state
that borders
Pakistan (7)
20 French city - and
wine (8)
21 See 19
22 Sir Derek ......,
star of Last Tango In
Halifax (6)

23 Rabindranath
......, known
as the bard of
Bengal (6)
Down
1 ...... National
Park, South
Africa’s largest game
reserve (6)
2 The sister of
Dido in Roman
mythology (4)

3 Pantheistic religion
associated with the
Punjab (7)
4 Dame Iris .....,
author of War In Val
d’Orcia (1947) (5)
5 Popular name
for da Vinci’s La
Gioconda (4,4)
6 Indian state on the
south- west coast (6)
12 Cartoonist known
for his work during
the second world
war (5,3)
14 Don ......., a tilter
at windmills (7)
16 Apostle who at
fi rst doubted the
resurrection? (6)
18/11 Indian state
on the east coast (6,7)
19/21A Indian
state facing Sri Lanka
(5,4)
21 .... Munchetty,
BBC presenter (4)

Back Hannah Jane Parkinson


Acts of pettiness delight me. They’re a reminder of the toy-throwing toddler in us all


The joy of small things


GETTY (3)


messages on to the white cliff s of Dover every time anything went wrong
during negotiations (ie always, as predicted) is pettiness writ large.
Celebrities, whose lot is essentially to be bullied in the public
sphere, take their revenge in small triumphant acts of vengeance:
wearing pointed slogan tees or turning the tables by taking
photographs of paparazzi photographing them. Break ups are also
rich sources of pettiness. See Calvin Harris refusing permission for his
ex-girlfriend Rita Ora to perform a song that she recorded, but that he
had written.
The best acts of pettiness are knowing. That’s what
stops them being pathetic. Often there’s no benefi t to the
architect of the pettiness, other than a small satisfaction.
The joy of it is that it speaks to the fact that, deep down,
we’re all just toddlers pretending to be adults.
I leave you with the most majestic act of pettiness ever
committed. When EE Cummings ’ fi rst poetry collection
was rejected by 14 publishers, he self-published it with
an amended title: No Thanks. On the dedication page
he wrote a poem entitled NO THANKS TO and listed
each of the publishers who had turned him down.
The poem was arranged in the shape of an urn.
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