not letting him be the provider and protector he
wants to be, and that’s going to be a problem for
him. You can’t allow a man to buy school clothes,
help put a roof over your head, put groceries in the
refrigerator and buy gas for the car, and then tell him
he doesn’t have the right to be a father figure—if not
a father—to the kids. If that’s the case, then what is
his point of being there? You’ll have to figure out
some kind of balance—one that allows your child’s
father to do his job, but also allows your new man to
do his job, too. And if he can’t participate in raising
the child, that could explain why the baby’s daddy
left in the first place.
Look, there are only a few Will and Jada Pinkett
Smiths in this world. If you’re one of them, congratu-
lations. But really, he’s not betting that you two will
hit it off too well, and so he won’t force the issue.