Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man

owners remember me—I could get the ultimate job as the
headliner, the comedian who gets his name on the marquee and
forty-five minutes to make people scream with laughter. I con-
trolled my fifteen minutes by making people laugh hard enough
to remember me, and then parlayed it into gigs as the “fea-
tured” comedian, the performer who gets thirty minutes on
the stage. And then I did the same thing with my thirty min-
utes onstage, making people laugh so hard that club owners
didn’t have any other choice but to make me the featured act.
See? My success in getting to be one of the Kings of Comedy
was based on my desire and ability to control my product—my
performance—which ultimately made me exactly who I wanted
to be. And doing that got me exactly what I wanted—success.
The same applies to a woman who wants to be a “keeper” rather
than a sports fish. You control what you can control—your image,
the way you conduct yourself, the way you let men talk to and
approach you—and use that to get the relationship you want.
Let me bring it home for you: imagine you’re in the health
club, and you’re on the stair climber, in your tight red athletic
bra and matching form-fitting spandex gym pants, glistening
and dewy with sweat, getting your workout on, looking really
fit and sexy. A good-looking guy comes in—he’s handsome, fit,
no rings on his fingers. And when he walks up to the treadmill
next to where you’re working out, the chemistry between the
two of you is electric; he smiles, you smile back; you move to
another machine, he moves to one not too far from you; he