“When you care for yourself first, the
world will find you worthy of care. Go to
bed an hour early, or get up an hour later”
fter a delay of 45 minutes,
Haemin Sunim is finally on
board a plane at London City
Airport. He’s looking forward
to reaching the Edinburgh
Wellbeing Festival where a
her to listen to him talk about
his new book. But sitting in his seat he hears the
announcement every plane passenger dreads: there
is a problem with the aircraft and the f light is now
cancelled. The next available one is leaving from
Heathrow at 6pm. Haemin’s event is at 3.30pm.
“I felt frustrated,” he says, recollecting the episode
of a few days earlier. A small cloud of tension passes
across his face, which otherwise radiates calm and
composure. “Five hundred people were waiting and
I’d have to disappoint them. At that point, I made a
decision. Rather than feeling like a victim, I said to
myself, ‘Let’s find the silver lining here’. I realised I
was able to give myself a mini vacation. I could have
dwelled upon the situation for two or three hours,
but I didn’t want to make myself unhappy.”
Haemin’s Zen so-simple-you-could-have-thought-
of-it-yourself-but-didn’t brand of wisdom has earned
him f locks of eager disciples around the world and
the (undeservedly silly) title of Mega Monk. With
a generous helping of mindfulness and lashings of
humility, he serves up easily digested, moreish
Buddhist teachings to nearly two million followers
on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram.GREAT EXPECTATIONS
The latest subject to receive the 21st century sage’s
signature treatment is imperfectionism. His book Love
for Imperfect Things was inspired by the fact that manyIf we stop striving for perfection and embrace our f laws, not only will we become happier, but we’ll
better understand those who are close to us, Zen Buddhist monk Haemin Sunim tells Ruth Chandler
people he meets are too hard on themselves. “It’s only
when we accept ourselves wholly, not partially – the
bad as well as the good – that we can become healthy
human beings,” Haemin says. “Then we can have an
understanding heart for others, who are also not
perfect.” He gives the example of becoming frustrated
with our loved ones: “We get the most annoyed by
those who are closest to us. And when the annoyance
is on both sides, an argument will inevitably break out.
When someone is showing their temper, it could be
because they want us to hear about their current
situation and empathise. Rather than arguing, try to
understand their deeper needs.”
As the title of his book suggests, it is inanimate
objects as well as people, that are subject to our overly
high expectations and sense of anticlimax: “I went to a
smart new café in my neighbourhood,” Haemin writes.
“I wanted to order a delicious-looking piece of cake
but, when I heard how expensive it was, I just ordered
some tea. I had that cake on my mind the rest of the
day. After two days, I still couldn’t get it out of my
mind, so I went back to the café, bought a slice and ate
it. It was delicious, but not extraordinarily delicious.”A MODERN MONK
So you may be wondering why Haemin is issuing
pearls of wisdom through books and on social media
rather than quietly and modestly meditating within
the walls of a monastery? “When I became a monk,
I realised it involved meeting people. After the service
at the monastery, they want to have tea and a chat with
us. I was 20-something and found that even people
in their 70s, with lots of life experience, wanted to tell
me their problems. All I could do was listen, but they
really appreciated it. That’s how I came to be »