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Dumber than Your Average Bear

While visiting Yellowstone National Park

some years back, my friend and I met with

a ranger who was in charge of maintaining

order in the campsites. He showed us how

to operate the new garbage cans; the com-

plex models had a rotating upper section

and a special door designed to keep out

hungry bears. Impressed, I asked the ranger

whether the fortified cans were working

as intended. He shook his head with a smile.

“Not really,” he said. “We’re finding consid-

erable overlap in the intelligence of the

smartest bears and the dumbest campers.”

—Guy Nelson Seattle, Washington

Gone with the Waves

When I was young, our

family vacationed at the

beach. My dad was always

the first to dive into the

waves, throwing his hair

back as he came up out of

the water. On one particu-

lar day, he started waving

his arms, shouting, “It’s

deep! It’s deep!” We all

heeded his warning and

immediately headed for

land. It wasn’t until we’d

reached the shoreline

that we realized he was

saying, “My teeth! My

teeth!” He had lost his

dentures, and they were

never seen again!

—Elizabeth V. Kozlowski

linthicum, maryland

The Stamp Act

Money was tight, and

we had to cut back on all

excess spending. Colleen,

my six-year-old daughter,

came to me with an

envelope and asked me

to mail it for her. She’d

received a letter from her

grandmother the day

before, and she handed

me the same envelope,

the flap crudely sealed

To read more true sto-

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with tape. She had

scrawled across the front

RETURN TO SENDER.

“What’s this?” I asked.

“I’m saving money on

a stamp!” she explained.

With tears flowing, I

hugged her hard. Things

got better, but that mem-

ory always stuck with me.

—Sharon Haiste

prince george,

british columbia

Reader’s Digest

illustration by Joana Avillez

YOUR

TRUE

STORIES

in 100 Words

40 may 2019 | rd.com