adapted from the book life is a joke, copyright
© 2017 by gordon and john javna. reprinted with
permission of workman publishing, workman.com.Soon the floodwaters chased
the man to the second floor. Luck-
ily, though, another boat came by.
“Get in the boat!” the rescuers urged.
“No way!” the man said. “I have
faith in God, and He will save me!”
The floodwaters continued to rise,
and the man had to climb to the roof
of his house. Fortunately, a rescue
helicopter came by and dropped a lad-
der for him. The pilot shouted through
a megaphone, “Grab the ladder!”
The man refused. “No! I have faith
in God, and He will save me!”
But the floodwaters rose above the
roof. The man was swept away and
drowned. When he arrived at the
pearly gates, he demanded an audi-
ence with God. “God,” he said, “I was
certain that you would save me, but
you let me die. Why? Why did you
abandon me?”
God replied, “What do you mean? I
sent you two boats and a helicopter!”
in other words ...
If you hold out for a gift tied up
with a bow, you might miss the
present right in front of you.9
A guy takes his date to a dinner
at the local country club. It’s an
unusual setup: People have to
wait in separate lines for each item
on the menu.
As his date sits down, the guy
volunteers to go get their dinner.
First he waits in the line for the roast
beef. Then he waits in the line for
the potatoes. Then he waits in the
vegetable line, the bread line, the
salad line, and the gravy line.
Finally he brings back two heaping
plates of food. “Are you thirsty?" he
asks his date. “What would you like
to drink?”
“A glass of punch would be nice,”
she says. So the guy goes to get it.
He finds a line for wine, a line for
beer, a line for soda, and even a
line for milk. After considering all
his options, he gives up and returns
empty-handed.
in other words ...
Sometimes there is no punch line.
Know when to walk away.Reader’s Digest Humor
90 april 2019
Quirky Question
Q: What do qwerty and zaq1zaq1 mean?A: That you’ve picked the wrong password.
Both seemingly meaningless character jumbles made SplashData’s 2018 list
of worst—as in overly used—passwords. (They may look silly, but they are really
the result of easy-to-type combinations on a standard keyboard.)