Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

wanted his people to work together, to share ideas, to all benefit from the effort.
But he was setting them up in competition with each other. One manager's
success meant failure for the other managers
As with many, many problems between people in business, family, and other
relationships, the problem in this company was the result of a flawed paradigm.
The president was trying to get the fruits of cooperation from a paradigm of
competition. And when it didn't work, he wanted a technique, a program, a
quick-fix antidote to make his people cooperate.
But you can't change the fruit without changing the root. Working on the
attitudes and behaviors would have been hacking at the leaves. So we focused
instead on producing personal and organizational excellence in an entirely
different way by developing information and reward systems which reinforced
the value of cooperation.
Whether you are the president of a company or the janitor, the moment you
step from independence into interdependence in any capacity, you step into a
leadership role. You are in a position of influencing other people. And the habit
of effective interpersonal leadership is Think Win-Win.
Six Paradigms of Human Interaction
Win-win is not a technique; it's a total philosophy of human interaction. In
fact, it is one of six paradigms of interaction. The alternative paradigms are win-
lose, lose-win, lose-lose, win, and Win-Win or No Deal TM
Win-Win
Win-win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in
all human interactions. Win-win means that agreements or solutions are mutually
beneficial, mutually satisfying. With a win-win solution, all parties feel good
about the decision and feel committed to the action plan. Win-win sees life as a
cooperative, not a competitive arena. Most people tend to think in terms of
dichotomies: strong or weak, hardball or softball, win or lose. But that kind of
thinking if fundamentally flawed. It's based on power and position rather than on
principle. Win-win is based on the paradigm that there is plenty for everybody,
that one person's success is not achieved at the expense or exclusion of the
success of others.
Win-win is a belief in the Third Alternative. It's not your way or my way; it's
a better way, a higher way.
Win-Lose
One alternative to win-win is win-lose, the paradigm of the race to Bermuda.
It says "If I win, you lose.
In leadership style, win-lose is the authoritarian approach: “I get my way;
you don't get yours.” Win-lose people are prone to use position, power,