Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

(Joyce) #1

Nor can the church give a person a constant sense of guidance. Church-
centered people often tend to live in compartments, acting and thinking and
feeling in certain ways on the Sabbath and in totally different ways on weekdays.
Such a lack of wholeness or unity or integrity is a further threat to security,
creating the need for increased labeling and self-justifying.
Seeing the church as an end rather than as a means to an end undermines a
person's wisdom and sense of balance. Although the church claims to teach
people about the source of power, it does not claim to be that power itself. It
claims to be one vehicle through which divine power can be channeled into
man's nature.
Self-Centeredness. Perhaps the most common center today is the self. The
most obvious form is selfishness, which violates the values of most people. But
if we look closely at many of the popular approaches to growth and self-
fulfillment, we often find self-centering at their core.
There is little security, guidance, wisdom, or power in the limited center of
self. Like the Dead Sea in Palestine, it accepts but never gives. It becomes
stagnant.
On the other hand, paying attention to the development of self in the greater
perspective of improving one's ability to serve, to produce, to contribute in
meaningful ways, gives context for dramatic increase in the four life-support
factors
These are some of the more common centers from which people approach
life. It is often much easier to recognize the center in someone else's life than to
see it in your own. You probably know someone who puts making money ahead
of everything else. You probably know someone whose energy is devoted to
justifying his or her position in an ongoing negative relationship. If you look,
you can sometimes see beyond behavior into the center that creates it.
Identifying Your Center
But where do you stand? What is at the center of your own life? Sometimes
that isn't easy to see
Perhaps the best way to identify your own center is to look closely at your
life-support factors. If you can identify with one or more of the descriptions
below, you can trace it back to the center from which it flows, a center which
may be limiting your personal effectiveness.
If you are Spouse Centered...
SECURITY
Your feelings of security are based on the way your spouse treats you.
You are highly vulnerable to the moods and feelings of your spouse.
There is deep disappointment resulting in withdrawal or conflict when your

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