Generality:“Yellow”. 255
Anonymous | 26 | she/her | nationality: Kazakhstani| ethnicity: Kazakh
“Yellow”.
I’ve been made feel unwelcome by East Asians folkson a number of
occasions telling me I’m not real Asian and I’m actuallywhite because
I’m pale and have featured that aren’t common fortheir ethnicities. I
could never identify with yellow in the context of“I’m Asian I’m yellow”
because it was made clear to me society doesn’t seeme that way. My
people will tell me I’m white. It actually hurts quitea bit.
“Asian”.
I think being Asian is more about race aka your geneticmarkers
belonging to regions of Asia going back millenniums.A white person
living in Asia would not be considered Asian.
Ethnicity|part1.
I’m Kazakh. We are Nomads. Forced to settle by Sovietsand survived
famine. We lost traditions and part of culture asa result. I have
complex feelings as I’m Kazakh who was told knowingRussian is more
important, then rejected by my own people for beingwhitewashed.
Ethnicity|part2.
I’m trying to understand myself through the historyof my ancestors. It
took me some time to get on the path where I’m notashamed to admit
where I’m from. Self-identity crisis involved is aresult of racism as in
Soviet Union they tried to erase our culture and manyothers. There’s
no peace for me if I don’t accept the sad and theugly parts as well.
Differ from Asian stereotype(s).
I’ve been trying to live my life outside of what mypeople think is the
norm. I respect my culture and ancestors and at thesame time I
understand I’m free to make my own choices becausetime changes. I
used to think any deviation from the plan that wasoutlined to me
meant I’m shaming my entire nation. We should be ableto recognize
that we’re still different individuals, with similarancestors, but there
countless amount of variations of how we could be.It’s been a long
journey of healing.
I guess something worth mentioning is I’ve been toldon multiple
occasions I’ve been living in Canada that I’m nota real Asian because
I’m from Kazakhstan. So I’ve definitely been toldI’m different from
whatever the stereotype is for most people. It’s notreally a good thing.
A theoretical space without racism.
It would be interesting to live in a world withoutprejudice. Many
things I’ve learned to hate about myself because otherskept treating
me with prejudice since little age. I would hope itwould nurture
empathy and compassion in us.
It seems almost like utopia, don’t think it will happenever, but it’s nice
to dream about it.
mchaos
(mchaos)
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