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Work stress, in-laws, money, sex, housework, a new baby: These are
the most typical areas of marital conflict, so there's a good chance at
least some of them are hot buttons in your relationship. Even in very
happy and stable marriages, these issues are perennials. Although
every relationship is different, there's a reason why these particular
conflicts are so common: They touch upon some of the marriage's
most important work.
Many people pay lip service to the notion that a good marriage
takes "work." But what specifically does this mean? Every marriage is
faced with certain emotional tasks that husband and wife need to
accomplish together for the marriage to grow and deepen. These
tasks come down to attaining a rich understanding between husband
and wife. A marriage needs this understanding in order for both
people to feel safe and secure in it. When these tasks are not
accomplished, the marriage feels not like a port in the storm of life
but just another storm.
When there's conflict in one of these six common areas, usually
it's because husband and wife have different ideas about these tasks,

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