will get away with it this time. That is sad, but your losses and his
losses are less if you walk away than if you call him a liar. If what he
has done reflects deceit, you will have other opportunities to address
it. It is much better to fail this time and preserve relationship than to
damage your relationship and fail to address the deceit as well.
What If I’m Not Sure What Happened?
(^) If you are not sure and your child won’t tell you, then there is
nothing to do. There will be other times when you will be sure of what
happened. At those times you can deal with your child’s needs. If you
are not sure of what happened, how can you secure an
acknowledgment from your child (step 3 in the spanking procedure)?
How do I know what the issue of the heart is if the situation is
ambiguous? Your credibility increases if you will not discipline when
things are unclear.
What If Nothing Works?
(^) There are two ways to look at this problem. First, you need to
assess whether there are some holes or inconsistencies in what you
are doing. Secondly, you need to be prepared to be obedient to God
whether or not it seems to bear fruit immediately. It is my experience
that most claims that biblical childrearing doesn’t work can be
understood in one of two ways. Either there is a failure to be
consistent in discipline and nuture, or there is some basic lack of
integrity in the parent’s relationship with God, his child, or both.
What If It Is Too Late?
(^) Perhaps you are feeling, “I’m learning all these things, but my
children are no longer five years old or younger.” There is no doubt
that it is easier to do the job of parenting right than to correct
problems. God is powerful, however, and we are never in a situation
in which there is no obedient response. I have seen families recover
lost ground through patient, honest obedience to God’s Word.