The Whole-Brain Child

didn’t  know    how to  comfort him.    I   ɹnally  screamed    back,

‘Sometimes  I   hate    you!’   ”

“My son was two and scratched   his baby    brother’s   face    so

hard    that    he  left    marks.  I   spanked his bottom, like    ɹve hard

swats.  Then    I   left    the room,   walked  down    the hall,   turned

back     around,     and     spanked     him     probably    ɹve     more    swats

again.  I   screamed    at  him so  loud,   I   terrified   him.”

“After   I   had     told    my  daughter    to  watch   out     for     her     little

brother running in  front   of  the swing,  she almost  swung   right

into    him.    I   was so  mad that    even    in  front   of  other   people  at

the  park    I   said    to  her,    ‘What’s     wrong   with    you—are     you

stupid?’    ”

These are some pretty awful parenting experiences, aren’t

they? They represent our downstairs moments, the times

when we’re so out of control that we say or do something

we’d never let anyone else say or do to our child.

The confessions above   come    from    real    parents whom    we

know personally. And although it may surprise you, each of

those parents does a great job at raising their kids. But like the

rest of us, they just lose it from time to time and say and do

things they wish they hadn’t.

Could   you add your    own downstairs  moment  to  the list

above? Of course you could. You’re a parent, and you’re

human. We see it time and again when we speak to and

counsel parents: in high-stress parenting situations, parents

make mistakes. All of us do.