change another’s mind, or allow them to trigger us into a state of
overwhelming emotion, we are no longer conscious but in ego.
Learning to detach from our thoughts and emotions, and consequently
from our external circumstances, can be disconcerting. We wonder,
“Does this mean I’ll stop loving others? Will I no longer care about
anything? Am I going to become cold and unfeeling?” To find ourselves
bereft of emotional drama is initially perturbing. Becoming comfortable
with this new state of internal affairs, getting used to living a drama-free
life, requires us to pass through a period when life may feel empty. This
is because we feel like we are losing a sense of connection to the real
world. In due course, we realize we aren’t losing anything, but instead
increasing our connection with the whole of reality.
When our children observe that we are less attached to emotional
drama, they follow suit. They discover that thoughts and emotions are
simply thoughts and emotions.IT’S ALL IN THE INTERPRETATION WE GIVE IT
Let me share with you an example of how the way we frame our
experience makes a world of difference. A sixteen-year-old suffers from
autism-related difficulties, which are accompanied by acute panic attacks
and paranoia. His panic attacks make him so anxious, he finds it
extremely difficult to trust anyone, which leads him to either act out or
withdraw. Consequently, he has a hard time socializing with his peers,
and even with leaving the house. Taking him out is a huge ordeal as the
panic attacks strike anytime, anyplace, while leaving him alone in the
house is never an option either. On a good day, he can be fun, easygoing,