relationship between parent and child. The transition to parenthood is
complex, requiring us to surrender to an irrevocable loss of our identity
as we have thus far known it. To create the internal space required to
embrace the tending of a new spirit, the pillars of our old lifestyle have
to crumble. Who we were before becoming a parent doesn’t and cannot
exist with the same ferocity. Once children enter our life, their impact is
indelible, and we are required to reinvent ourselves in response.
If we view the various stages of our child’s development not only
through the lens of how our children are progressing according to a scale
or comparison with others, but as an opportunity for spiritual and
emotional growth for both them and us, we begin walking this path as
spiritual partners, finding kinship in what each offers the other.
We will look at the spiritual lessons of raising our children in two
sections. In this chapter, we’ll examine the years up until they go to
school. Then in the next chapter, we’ll address the school years.THE LESSONS OF INFANCY FOR THE PARENT
No sooner do we arrive at our front door with our bundle of joy than our
lifestyle changes. Just the fact that we feed our infants on a schedule not
subject to our circadian rhythms is a huge shift. As we move from being
individuals in our own right to being in the service of our infant, our
boundaries elasticize beyond anything we could have imagined. To draw
upon our capacity to love and serve another is both deeply moving and a
shock.
In the infant stage, the primary spiritual agenda revolves around
oneness and togetherness. This is when the deepest bonding takes place.