and Sara sat up at night worrying about Austin. “He might go through his
childhood years with very few opportunities to grow from his mistakes,”
they reasoned.
Most of us don’t “suffer” from Doug and Sara’s problem. Our kids
mess up plenty. As they do, they will have more than enough chances to
grow in responsibility as they resolve their problems.
LOVE AND LOGIC TIP 9
Responsible Kids, Irresponsible KidsThe most responsible kids I (Jim) encountered during my three
decades in the education field were the kids at an inner-city school
where I served as an assistant principal. They all hailed from
federally funded housing projects. Those kids woke up in the
morning without an alarm clock and got to school in time for
breakfast without any assistance from their parents. They knew that
if they got there, they got breakfast; if they didn’t, they missed it.
They never missed a bus when it was going someplace they wanted
to go.
The most irresponsible kids I ever saw were in an upper-
middle-class suburban school. The first day of school, a
thousand kids arrived in eighteen different buses. Half of these
kids ran straight to the playground for some pre-bell frolic; the
other half raced directly to the principal’s office to phone their
folks for forgotten registration materials, coats, and lunches.
Responsible behavior has a direct correlation to the number
of decisions children are expected to make. The more they
make, the more responsible they become.Mother, Please, I’d Rather Do It Myself
Oftentimes we impede our kids’ growth. We put ourselves exactly where