every night is a surefire way of preventing crime, drug abuse,
academic underachievement, teenage pregnancy, and a bunch of other
social challenges.
But sometimes going out with the whole crew is not all it’s
cracked up to be for three reasons. The first is sibling rivalry. Mom
and Dad are at the beach, for instance. Their six-year-old son says
something rude to his eight-year-old sister, who throws her hot dog at
her brother, who laughs as it misses and gets full of sand. Now both
kids are screaming at each other, and everyone on the beach is staring.
That isn’t fun.
The second reason fun with the entire family doesn’t always work
is because the more people you put together in the same place, the
greater the chance for differences of opinion and conflict. At 9:30
a.m. on the second day of their family vacation, for example, Mark
wants to go to Creature Castle, Cynthia wants to go to the pool, Mom
wants to have a leisurely cup of coffee, and Dad wants to jog three
miles.
The final reason family fun is overrated is because the best parent-
child bonding occurs in one-on-one parent-child interactions.
Children cherish alone time with a mother or father, without the
presence of their greatest rivals—their siblings. They open up, they
feel free, and they kind of blossom. It would be a shame to rarely—or
never—experience that kind of bonding with each of your children
individually.
Play with Your Child
It’s very important, therefore, to take your kids, one at a time, and
regularly do something you both like. It’s more peaceful because
there’s no fighting between siblings, and coordinating different
agendas is no problem because there are only two agendas to