Another idea is to simply put some kind of lock on the door. This
advice worries some parents who think that their child will become
claustrophobic or that locking the door is abusive. Locking the door
for a short time is not by itself abusive, but for some groups (for
example, foster parents) and in some places (for example, some
provinces of Canada) it is illegal. If you have a really difficult child,
you should check what regulations apply to your situation and get
some professional advice.
Here’s an option for locking the door. You tell your child that as
long as he stays in his room, the door will remain open or simply
shut. But the first time he comes out, the door gets locked for the rest
period. Many children will quickly learn to stay put without the door
having to be locked. If you still prefer gates to locks, purchase one of
the more solid gates that bolts into the doorjambs. If the child can
climb over the gate, get a taller one or put two up.
The main point is this: some children will try to keep coming out
of the room. If so, securing the door in some way is absolutely
essential. It is totally unproductive and harmful to be chasing the kids
back into the room all the time. The child must know that the door is
a barrier that he’s stuck with for a short time. Once children learn
they can’t get out of the room, they will stop their tantrums and
calmly accept the brief period of quiet.
If you worry about the safety of the child, childproof the room,
secure any windows, and remain outside the door during the time-out
—but try not to let the child know you’re there. If you still feel the
child is not safe alone in the room or if you feel he would suffer
excessive separation anxiety, you may go in the room during the
time-out. But no eye contact and no talking!
And don’t forget the one-minute-per-year rule for the length of the
rest period. Remember that you may not increase the length of the
time-out simply because you’re in a bad mood. You can increase the
length of time-out—to a point—if the child did something that is
marcin
(Marcin)
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