Plan B 97he needs to successfully navigate frustrations and de-
mands for flexibility on his own, you’re fired. Who fired
you? He did. Why’d he fire you? Because children do
well if they can. Same as with any other learning dis-
ability.
This next part is important. There are two ways to do
Plan B: Emergency Plan B and Proactive Plan B. On first
hearing about Plan B, many folks come to the erroneous
conclusion that the best time to use Plan B is just as a
child is becoming frustrated. That’s Emergency Plan B,
and it’s actually not the best timing because the child is
already getting heated up. Few of us do our clearest
thinking when we’re heated up. As discussed earlier,
most explosions are highly predictable. Thus, there’s no
reason to wait until the child gets heated up yet again to
try to solve the problem that’s been causing explosions
for a very long time. The goal is to get the problem solved
proactively—before it comes up again. That’s Proactive
Plan B.
For example, if your child always balks at brushing
his teeth, the best time to have a Plan B discussion with
him is before he’s faced with the task of teeth brushing
again rather than in the heat of the moment. If your
child routinely has difficulty with his homework, the
time to have a Plan B discussion aimed at solving that
problem is before he’s struggling with his homework the
next time.