220 The Explosive ChildMother: So what should I do?
Therapist: Plan B.Another mother felt so drained by being a full-time
parent to her three other children that she simply had no
energy left for helping her explosive son. A father had to
get a handle on his own explosiveness before he could
help his daughter with hers. (He found that many of the
Plan B strategies he was using with his daughter helped
him explode less often, too.) Another father needed to be
medicated for ADHD before he was able to stick to the
plan agreed upon in treatment. Yet another father had to
come to grips with his excessive drinking and its impact
on the whole family before he could press ahead with Plan
B. It’s hard to work on helping your child if you’re feeling
the need to put your own house in order first. Take care of
yourself. Work hard at creating a support system for your-
self. Seek professional help or other forms of support if
you need it. These things don’t change on their own.
GRANDPARENTSAt times it’s necessary to bring grandparents into the
therapeutic mix. In many families, grandparents or other
relatives function as co-parents, taking care of the chil-
dren while the parents are at work. We need to make