286 Indexdiagnosis, of explosive children, 5–6, 17,
55, 58, 65
difficult issues, handling of, 169–75
disagreements, working out, and
unevenness of skills
development, 12–13
discipline
characteristics of explosive children,
60, 62
consequences, 81
differences between other children and
explosive children, 9
explosions as learned, 76
identification of factors compromising
skills of flexibility and frustration
tolerance, 24
in school, 247–49, 251, 266–69
need for different approaches to, 9
parents as poor disciplinarians, 16–17
standard approach to behavior
management, 75–78
understanding explosive children,
16–17
using different types of, 168
“disconfirming” old thoughts, 202
distractibility, 231, 234–35
doctors, 232–33, 240
doing it a different way, as category of
solution, 183–86
dwelling on past, 217
dyskinesia, 238
eczema, 18
Eduardo (child), 93–95
educated guesses, 100
embarrassment factor, 169, 244
Emergency Plan B, 97, 99–103, 114–17,
121–29, 132, 152, 256–58, 265, 273
emotion regulation skills, 12, 14,
53–54, 64, 195–96, 236
and identification of pathways, 24, 32,
35–41
See also separation of affect
emotional illiteracy, 46
Emotional Intelligence (Goleman), 19–20
emotions
categorizing and expressing, 32
labeling, 194
language processing skills, 32
of siblings, 206–10
vocabulary of, 190
See also emotion regulation skills
empathy
ambiguity, 166
black-and-white thinking, 101
cognitive flexibility skills, 197
concerns, 99–101
delayed responses, 164
difficult issues, 169–71
factors that cause Plan B to go astray,
133–37
how to empathize, 99–100
identifying and articulating concerns,
179–80
importance of, 98–99, 134
learning curves, 133–37, 147, 164–66,
169–71
low-risk, 101, 123
parking lot problem, 147
Plan B in school, 254–55
refined, 100–103, 106, 113, 165
reflective listening, 99–101
siblings, 208
as step in Plan B, 98–103, 105–6,
110–14, 121, 197
training other skills with Plan B, 197
See also reassurance; specific problem
empowerment, of parents, 176
Eric (child), 216–17
executive skills, 24–31, 53–54, 187,
194–95. See also organization and
planning skills; separation of affect;
shifting cognitive set
expectations
characteristics of explosive children,
64–66, 70
communication patterns in families,
216–17