want to set up that habit. Also, if you’re bending over backward to
get the kid to pee, it starts to smell like fear. Kids can smell fear a
mile away, and it will either make them fearful or they will eat you for
breakfast.
So what can you do? Some mild form of distraction is fine. I would
stay away from TV, though. Don’t put the potty in front of a video or
program and let your child just sit there. It may get them to sit, but it
is way too passive. They are just getting the pee in the potty by
chance because they happen to be sitting there. What they need to be
learning is to act on the feeling of having to pee.
On that note, phone games, tablets, and other electronic devices
as potty entertainment are okay for the first couple of days if you have
to. I don’t suggest them, but some parents specifically ask. Just don’t
make it a habit. As with TV, these devices make the peeing/pooping
passive, and can quickly lead to manipulation (the child demands a
reward in order to pee or poop). My bottom line is that if your child
can play a game on a mobile device, your child is more than capable
of putting pee and poop in the potty.
Remember, the idea is to normalize the use of the potty, not to
make it into a big game or special thing.
The “Calm Jar”: This is a distraction that works well for a few
different situations. Make a Calm Jar out of a Mason jar or a clear
plastic water bottle. Fill it with water, medium-sized glitter, and some
oil or glycerin. The result is a sort of snow globe. Many parents use
the Calm Jar in lieu of a time out: the child can shake it and watch
the glitter settle, which is calming and relaxing and takes a minute.
I’ve found the Calm Jar to be excellent for kids who want to pop right