CHAPTER 12

Day Cares and Other Caregivers

Okay—day cares can throw a major wrench in the potty training

process. I used to believe that everything hinged on having your day
care on board. But I’ve changed my mind a bit and have helped many,
many parents negotiate success with or without the day care’s
cooperation.
Before you even begin potty training, find out your day care’s
policy. Most larger day cares will have a formal policy. Home day
cares and nanny situations may not have a formal policy, but they’ll
still have their own opinion of how this should go down. So find out.
Ask them many questions. Many day cares say they will work with
you, but you’ll find later that they really won’t. Alternately, they may
have some weird notions of what they can and can’t do. It’s best to
find out what they do before you walk in on a Monday morning and
are shocked. Some day cares are well versed in potty training and will
help as much as they can. The bummer is that most aren’t, so here’s
the ​un-sugar-coated version of what’s going on.
In September 2012, I was inundated with emails from all over the
country. These were official positions from day cares, specifically
stating that children MUST be fully potty trained while wearing a
pull-up. The diaper was not to be removed until the child could stay