Oh Crap! Potty Training

were in the backseat, and you had no idea where you were going. I’ve
extrapolated that idea even further. Imagine if your child were
responsible for giving you the directions, and that you just followed their
directions. Go left. Go straight. No. Left. Wow. You’d soon be lost,
yes? That’s where things can get mucky with the oft-touted child-led
model of parenting. You can be child-led in that you listen to and
validate your child, but you simply cannot follow your child’s lead
through life. You both will get lost. The car you are driving is life,
and it’s your job to know where you are going. Ironically, many of the
parents I’ve worked with and have known in my personal life are
striving to give their child a “free” childhood. Still, how free is your
child if he is fully responsible for the direction the car is traveling?
It’s very anxiety provoking. A truly free childhood should be about
chocolate or vanilla, and little else.
All this is particularly true if you have a spirited or strong-willed
child. I often work with parents who have a child fitting this
description. This child is usually challenging in general and will be
challenging when it comes to potty training as well. Still, this child
needs boundaries and limits just as much as, if not more than, your
garden-variety kid.
All well and good, Jamie, but what does this have to do with potty
training?
Well, sometimes behavior kicks up during potty training. And
because potty training is so wrought with emotion, it becomes hard to
pull it apart from behavior. I also find that parents will put up with
all kinds of behavior during potty training that they wouldn’t in other
circumstances.